Come Together

Hello, kit-kit! Well, yeah, there’s going to be sort of competition, but I’m going to mix up things a bit. Well, it’s gotten too quiet: Ahrae and Vegeta are almost allies now, so I got bored a bit. Besides I need to prove that Ahrae is a good character ;) Oh, you’ll what I’m talking about ;)

Hello, Webtester 01! Sorry for grammar, I’ll try to better it.
Yeah, finally they are on their way. I was messing around way too long ;)

Hello, Vitamin Z! Exactly this is what I’m writing about - utopic love. I just like imagining that this thing is possible: equal and completely trustful and devoted love. It’s not adventures or something else I’m concentrated on, as the most people think. I’m writing about utopia. For me it doesn’t matter, are they men or women. Well, men are a bigger challenge, besides I just couldn’t help myself – I really love Vegeta’s personage.
In reality there’s no such love. No one loves equal in pair and never for the same reasons. And if there’s such love it can’t survive in this world (remember Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet, Ingeborg Bachman’s ‘Malina’ and many others). So I give for Goku and Vegeta’s utopic love an utopic world then. It’s easy: they are only a cartoon, a fiction, and to create another fantasy world is peace of cake. Ok, maybe now I sounded like a bloody pessimist. No, I do believe that love exists, but also I do believe that there are many kinds of love.
Ahrae. Yes, I was quite excited about opportunity to see Vegeta’s past (well, I mean to ponder what it might have been and how later it might affect his relationship with people who survived his onslaught). And while pondering I realized that I see him as a repenting person (not very sure if this is the right word). I see him having remorse about taking lives of so many people. In my first story I created him very fond of his son. Whoever loves his child has to have at least some understanding about how painful death can be and what pain you create for other people killing their beloved and children. Vegeta is a very strong and prideful character and while he not necessary would beg for forgiveness and understanding, he would be truly remorseful.
Ahrae in this story is a representative of all Vegeta’s destroyed planets and killed people. Naturally she sees him as a murder and wants revenge. With the time she starts to doubt that stereotype about Vegeta, she begins to see him as a devoted lover and a father. But it’s hard to forgive, to let it simply go. It’s always easier to blame someone, to feel that there’s a reason for what happened, to let frustration out on someone. She can’t stand a thought about Vegeta’s change, she still wants to impersonate her revenge. And on the other side there’s her whole clan expecting that from her. Ahrae gets confused and gets out of track. She wants to kill Vegeta. She can do that. I gave her the power (this is the reason – to show how her forgiveness is important: she can kill but she chooses not to). I also gave her the power to see the difference between revenge and justice. Ahrae is a good-natured person and in the end she realized she had been selfish to pretend not to see the change in Vegeta and still to want incarnate her revenge. She won the battle against hatred.
Hmm…I know now you are going to gap and laugh later, but I haven’t got a clue who is Mary Sue. Hell, rhymes, doesn’t it? I would be very glad if you explained. Have in mind that I’m from the Eastern Europe, and I don’t quite know all the stuff. Thanks.
Yes, Ahrae still has a mission to accomplish (no, nothing deceiving or something like that). I have saved something for the end of the story. Well, who reads attentively will figure out, but I didn’t want people to know yet, so don’t be upset if you have not a clue what I’m talking about – it’s not so easy to see. But Vegeta is going to have some shock.
Well, your question about panic attacks is going to be answered in this chapter, so it would be no point in talking about that. It’s just lucky coincidence that we have some of them in this chapter.
Everybody keeps asking me about Trunks and leaves notes saying that they hope Trunks is still alive. And I always answer – this story is not about Trunks. This is story about discovering things while on the way to find him. Hahaha, no, I didn’t mean to sound angry or what, I just absolutely ignore him. But I can say that I never killed anyone in my stories (at least good guys, or those who said at least several sentences in the fic) yet ;)
Thanks for your review, it was really nice!

Come Together by chayron (lttomb@yahoo.com) (Chapters 1-9 beta-read by Sabi-san; chapters 10-11 beta-read by S.P.; chapters 12-16 beta-read by Amazing Jess S)

Disclaimer: I don’t own DBZ. I’m not making any money of this fic.
Warnings: Yaoi, male/male. Goku/Vegeta.

Part 16

A light rustle somewhere beside him woke Vegeta. He heard a hushed voice close by.

“And what do you think you are doing?” that was Ahrae. “Stop moving or I’ll cut your fucking throat.”

Then followed a soft gasp and mumble. “What’s going on? Shit! Ahrae? Put that knife away!” That was Ragas’ voice.

“What were you doing at Vegeta’s bed?” Ahrae hissed.

“Shit! Put the knife away! I have no idea what I was doing – I’m sleepwalker! I must have gotten here accidentally!”

There was silence for a moment. “I don’t know if you are telling the truth, but if I see something suspicious, I’ll kill you.”

“Good to know you are so concerned about my well being…” Vegeta chuckled. He heard Ragas gasp. Ahrae softly laughed and released Ragas.

“That was simply a misunderstanding…” Ragas shook his head then rubbed his neck. “As I said, I have a nasty habit – sometimes I walk while sleeping…”

Ahrae shrugged her shoulders. “One can’t be too careful…” She motioned to Goku’s bed; today he and Vegeta were sleeping separately. “And he’s still sleeping… You could blast a hole near his head and he wouldn’t wake up…”

“No, he isn’t sleeping; he simply doesn’t understand the language.” Vegeta turned to Goku. “Go back to sleep, it was a misunderstanding, apparently he is a sleepwalker,” he said to Goku.

There was a yawn. “Okay.” Then a soft snoring followed.

XXXXX

Vegeta woke up after six hours; it was still dark outside, sighing he went to the toilet. On the way he took a candle with him.

Vegeta stared at his reflection on the mirror in the bathroom then sat on the floor. He put the candle before him then put his head in his arms. With the each passing day the chances of Trunks being alive were diminishing. For a long time he was able to fight, not to give in into those thoughts, but they were intensifying with each hour, minute second…and he was at the point of breaking. But he couldn’t let that happen! He had to move on, no matter what. But that was so hard.

Vegeta blinked. His vision became blurry. Of fuck! Not now! Vegeta carefully stood up. He had to reach the capsule with medicine. His legs were shaking badly and he realized he wouldn’t be able to reach it. A panic wave shot down his spine and he fell to the ground with a hiss.

“Prince Vegeta!”

Vegeta saw Ahrae’s face swimming before his face. At least he was wearing boxers.

“What’s wrong? Are you in pain?” Vegeta felt a light brush on his forehead. “Goku, come here! Something is wrong with him!”

Goku in an instant was at Vegeta’s side. “Shit!” He rushed back to the belt with capsules.

“What’s it?” Ahrae raised Vegeta’s upper body from the floor and put his head in her lap. Vegeta’s body was shaking convulsively.

“He’s sick,” Goku already was back with a filled glass.

“I see that, but what’s wrong with him?”

“It’s a panic attack.” Goku managed to make Vegeta drink while Ahrae was holding him.

“A what?” Ahrae looked surprised at the man in her arms. “He is stressed?” She realized that was a stupid question but at the time that was the only thing that came into her head.

“Of course he is stressed! His son is kidnapped, we are sitting here and can’t do anything, and the time is running out!” Goku was stroking Vegeta’s face gently. With relief he noticed that Vegeta’s struggles were lessening.

“Err…what’s going on?” Ragas was standing in the doorway to the bathroom and glancing over Goku’s shoulders at almost naked Vegeta.

“Nothing,” Ahrae pushed Vegeta over to Goku, she quickly stood up and went outside the bathroom, pulling Ragas with her, “his stomach didn’t react too well to that kipper…”

“He is lying on the floor…” Ragas leaned at the wall before her.

“When my stomach hurts I don’t have a time to think what I want to do!” Ahrae stared at him her arms crossed.

“Maybe I could help? I have some healer abilities. If he has some troubles with his body functions or has some physical discomfort, I could try to help,” Ragas tried to discern Ahrae’s face in the darkness.

“A healer?” Ahrae thought a moment. Maybe that’s what Vegeta needed at the moment... “I can’t make such decisions. Talk to him when he feels better,” Ahrae shook her head and went to search for some candles.

XXXXX

“Vegeta?” Goku gently brushed the prince’s hair. He felt Vegeta’s fingers dig into his arm, curl tighter then again uncurl. “It’s okay, it’s me,” Goku softly kissed the widow’s peak before him. Vegeta’s eyelids fluttered open.

“What happened?” the prince’s voice was shaking.

“You had a panic attack, Ahrae found you here...” Goku felt Vegeta startle. Goku sighed – Vegeta still thought his panic attacks to be unforgivable and shameful weakness.

“She saw?”

“Yes…”

“Shit…” Vegeta heavy exhaled.

Goku scooped the prince closer into his arms and carefully lifted him from the floor, felt Vegeta’s arms wrapping around his neck to support himself. “This is nothing to be ashamed of,” Goku shook his head, “I told you that scores of times...” Goku shifted Vegeta in his arms while fumbling for doorknob. “Do you drink the medicine?”

“Yes.”

Goku nodded. Even in a feeble candlelight he could see that Vegeta wasn’t lying.

“And Ragas?” Vegeta asked uneasy.

“I don’t know…he didn’t see much. Ahrae said something to him and shoved him out.” Goku opened the door and turned to Vegeta’s bed with the bundle on his arms. Some candles lit the room and he mentally thanked Ahrae. Then Goku saw how Ahrae uncovered the sheets from Vegeta’s bed and motioned for him, and he thanked her one more time. He passed the table then carefully laid the prince on the bed and began to cover him with sheets.

“Stop treating me as if I were a deathly sick!” Vegeta tried to wriggle from the sheets but Goku pressed his palms at the both Vegeta’s sides and trapped him.

“Be good boy and lay still. We still can’t go anywhere: it’s dark outside and it’s raining… try to sleep.”

“Grrr…insolent baka!” Vegeta growled half-heartedly. “You’ll pay for this!”

Goku gave him a wink. “Anytime when bathroom is free…” He could see Vegeta suppress a smile then Vegeta relaxed and leaned into the bedding.

Ahrae shifted in her seat. “Ragas said he has some healer abilities and offered his help. He said he even could heal psychical ailments. Would you like to try?” Ahrae asked Vegeta before he could fall asleep. “But only if you trust him…”

“I don’t trust him,” Vegeta answered and nestled down more cozily.

“You don’t trust anyone…” Goku rolled his eyes. “It might be a good idea. Maybe you could get rid of this illness once and for all.”

“Maybe…” Vegeta stared at the ceiling. The thought was very welcome. “I’ll think about that.”

Crawling in bed with him Goku kissed him on the cheek contently. “Okay, now go to sleep.”

After several minutes Vegeta was fast asleep and Goku rose from Vegeta’s bed. He stretched and flexed his muscles. “Those damn panic attacks always make him tired…” He yawned. “Let’s make something to eat.”

“How often does he have them?” Ahrae rose from her seat and turned to the fridge.

“Frequently…some stress here or there then bam – and he is gasping for air…” Goku shook his head sadly, following Ahrae to the fridge. “Now he takes medicine… I cannot imagine his previous life…”

“Did he have them all the time? I mean when he served Frieza?”

Goku nodded. “When they started, he was about twenty. He doesn’t speak about this unless you drag it out of him.” Goku warned then sighed. “He is a very emotional person with unpredictable mood swings. From childhood he had no one to count on, no one to talk to, to understand him. The humiliation, killing, loneliness, blackness and fear were his companions, just an endless terror that wouldn’t ever stop tormenting him. The fear of nothingness, a vacuum, if you will, I think that’s where those seizures are from... I don’t know for sure though.” Goku sighed again. “You know even his wife had no idea about these panic attacks…he can be very private when he wants…”

“His wife?” Ahrae blinked surprised. She turned from the contents of the fridge to face Goku.

“Yeah, I have a wife too…” Goku softly laughed at her expression.

“And Trunks is…?” Ahrae was still blinking.

“…His and his wife’s son,” Goku looked at the fridge over her shoulder.

“Oh…oh… I thought he was your son…yours and your Prince’s…” Ahrae scratched her head. “Though I found it strange that you had a son and still weren’t mated…”

“We will mate and have a bunch of kids!” Goku laughed softly while ransacking the fridge. Finally he found something edible. “I think this will do,” he put canned meat Ahrae under nose who shoved the can away from her face.

“Yeah, you do with that thing what you want to do and I am going to do the only thing you taught me – peel potatoes…” she sighed. “Someone was very wise to put ten sacks of them into your capsule…”

“Yeah, my wife was always very attentive,” Goku nodded. “I wonder what creatures we would be hunting now but for those potatoes…so far all that I’ve seen is that this swamp is full of mucous ugliness… ” He scrunched his nose at the thought.

Ahrae laughed. She waved for Ragas to join her in her task. After all after the meal yesterday the man said that he liked boiled potatoes. “See,” she smirked at Goku when Ragas joined her, “now I have someone to command…”

“Thirst for domination?” Goku chuckled, trying to open the can. He growled in irritation when he almost broke the knife.

“No, I have plenty of that at home…but now your Prince treats me like one of his subordinates…” Ahrae looked at the can in Goku’s hand. Goku threatened to squash it and splash all content around. “Take my sword, it’s in a blue capsule, only go to the bathroom. I don’t think it would be a good idea for Ragas to recognize the Fire Clan’s sword…” Ahrae motioned to her belt, lying on her bed. “And don’t cut your hands…”

“Very funny…” Goku mugged, taking the capsule with the sword.

“No, I’m serious; I doubt you have ever seen anything so sharp…”

“You would be surprised…” Goku chuckled but of course he wasn’t going to reveal to her about Future Trunks. Ahrae’s brow rose in question but he didn’t explain further.

Ahrae and Ragas were left in the room alone.

“How is Vegeta?” Ragas raised his eyes to Ahrae.

“Better as you see,” Ahrae motioned with the peeler to Vegeta’s bed. “I told him about your healing abilities. He said he would think about that.”

Ragas turned to Vegeta. Better… This didn’t seem to be better. The Saiyan was pale as the sheet on his bed, which he was gripping tightly with his fingers. He could see that, even in that poor light they had. Ragas turned his head back to his potato. Vegeta and that other Saiyan were affectionate to each other. He still could see Vegeta in other Saiyan’s arms, Vegeta’s hands wrapped around that corded neck, and the gentleness which could be seen in the bigger Saiyan’s eyes… Vegeta didn’t like the concern about him, he tried to push the bigger Saiyan away, but the orange dressed Saiyan was insistent and Vegeta conceded.

Despite the fact that during the fight with remon he had seen that Vegeta was more than capable of taking care of himself, something about Vegeta stirred in Ragas an urge to protect him, to ensure his security and health. Maybe that was because of the Saiyan’s compact body and smaller height… Ragas wasn’t sure why but he liked Vegeta. Perhaps the little vicious man had some spells, which drew others to him. A strange combination: unbelievable strength and fierceness, which stirred protective feelings in others…

Raga’s eyes narrowed at the orange dressed Saiyan who came back from the bathroom, the open can in one hand and a blue capsule in other. He said something to Ahrae. Ahrae rolled her eyes and stuck up a finger at him. The Saiyan stuck his tongue at her. Is that some kind of sign language? Ahrae snorted and went back to peeling potatoes. The Saiyan shook out the contents of the can into the pan, added some spices and frying oil then joined them in the task. The Saiyan and Ahrae began to talk about something. He didn’t like that. He was feeling like an outsider, of course he was the outsider but…that was simply ignorant. Not that he cared much, but he was bored and while talking to Ahrae he could get more information. This was that big Saiyan’s fault; he was stealing everyone’s attention from him! The girl was a good-looking one and he wouldn’t mind to get to know her better. She was hot and spunky and at the same time very amiable. And she was powerful. That nonsense about accidental blast…she was modest and…cautious… …and was keeping company with the orange dressed Saiyan! Perhaps he had cast a spell on the others, but not on him since they didn’t speak the same language. He couldn’t deny that the orange dressed Saiyan was beautiful too, but somehow he didn’t have that fire which attracted him to Vegeta immediately…

“Could you show me how to escape force fields?” Goku asked Ahrae.

Ahrae thought a moment. “Yes, I could. But ask Prince Vegeta first. I don’t want my butt kicked…”

Goku narrowed his eyes at the potato in his hand. “I don’t need Vegeta’s permission.” So what that for some time he was pretending that Vegeta had authority over him? In reality Goku still refused to let Vegeta’s title control him. He was raised on Earth and why he should care about long forgotten social status? On Earth everyone was equal (at least should be!), and because his life was spent on the Earth he wasn’t going to change his ways. Of course he acknowledged Vegeta’s title but nothing more. He didn’t see why the title should give any privileges to Vegeta. His people even didn’t vote him in; no, he got it for free, because of royal blood in his veins. Goku doubted if Vegeta would be a good ruler…the prince was too rush to act, too harsh and too unpredictable. You needed to find a way with him; you needed to get to know him. All the times he let Vegeta order him around was because he let him, not because of his title or authority…no, only because he let Vegeta do that.

“I noticed that, but it’s my skin which might suffer,” Ahrae shook her head. “He is highly possessive about you…”

Goku sighed. Now when he had thought about it, he felt like a fool – after Vegeta and he got together, Vegeta had never tried to use his title. He didn’t hear ‘I’m the Prince of All Saiyans’ anymore. Vegeta didn’t expect him to comply. Vegeta accepted the situation several months before, then when he admitted his love to ‘third-class-nothing’… Hell, Vegeta was going to mate him even when he knew the possible outcome of the battle before mating… Goku hung his head in shame. And how could he think such things about Vegeta?

TBC