Pleasured Deconstruction

A/N: I still dont own FMA. It's in negotiations though...sike. Oh and being smoked is when a higher ranking officer can do pretty much whatever he/she wants to you in any situation, anywhere. You'll understand...I hope.




I'm still on the floor. It's actually becoming quite comfortable. I don't know how much time has elapsed since Izumi left, but the blood in my nose has clotted and dried, and the phone is ringing. I have an idea of who it is, but my shame and lack of wanting to deal prevents me from getting up and answering.

"Hello. You have reached the Mustang Compound. No one is currently able to accept this call, but leave a name, number, and message, and we will be expedient in returning your call. If this is an emergency, hang up and dial 911. If this is Maes, whatever Elysia did, I don't care." Beep.

"Edward. I know you are there. I can't keep covering for you. Ross and Brosh are meeting you in an hour. Roy has been asking questions. This is the last time. He has a meeting with Bradley and Haruko in thirty minutes. I suggest you and Izumi hurry. Oh and remember, delete this message. I've worked too hard to get fired over some bullshit like this." Click.

I sighed and looked toward the answering machine. Riza always had my back, even though I stole her happiness from her. She and Roy were making strides towards being in a somewhat happy and normal life, but I destroyed all of that. Yet and still, she allowes me to whine to her and tell her all the things I've been doing wrong. Maybe she's waiting for when I truly fuck up so she can point and laugh in both me and Roy's faces. Maybe she's over it. I don't know. Riza is weird like that.

I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror, cringing at the sight. I took another shower and carefully cleaned the crust out of my nose before putting on my black outfit and red jacket, heading out of the door. Of course, I remember to delete the message Riza left, sighing as I did so.

What a heel.

I smiled at Mrs. Morrison and today, she miraculously smiled back! Maybe she heard the ass kicking I got and is sympathetic to me. Nonetheless, her smile gives me the strength to drive to Central's base.

I arrive at base fairly quickly, perhaps police knew who I was and gave me a pass on speeding.

'And who exactly are you, Edward Elric?'

“Major Elric!” A shrill voice called from across the grounds.

'FUCK!!!'

I turned and mustered a smile for a very agitated Ross. Obviously Brosh had nearly driven the woman insane, for when I arrived, she spotted me and ran full throttle at me.

“Sir, with all due respect-” I held up my hand and silenced her. I knew I was late, and her voice was starting to make my head hurt. Ross quieted her mouth, but then frowned and pressed her face close to mine.

“Are you developing a gin blossom, sir?” And that was the way the rest of the day went, people staring at the tip of my reddened nose. Izumi sure knew how to hit someone and leave a mark! I had grown tired of people staring at me, so I retired to Roy's office where I knew I'd be alone. Laying on the couch, I put my arm over my eyes and nodded off to sleep.

“I can see you, Edward. Remember what I said.” I awoke with a jolt off the couch, falling hard on the floor. I heard Izumi's voice, I knew it! But Izumi wasn't the one standing over me. It was that damned Maes Hughes! What was he doing in here?

“Edward, did you forget?” He asked in a snide voice.

'Forget...? Huh?'

As if he could sense my thoughts, Hughes thrust a wide notebook at me. It was the case studies on Scar and the Eastern Rebellion. I stared dumbly at it before smacking myself in the forehead with my hand, muttering obscenities.

“I assumed you came in here to hide. You know these were supposed to be done by 15:00, right?” Hughes pressed, swatting my legs aside so he could sit on the couch also. All I could do was nod. I rubbed my eyes and looked at the clock. 15:30. Yep...I'm fucked.

“Why didn't you do them?” Hughes had a sly grin on his face, ready to pin my lack of concentration and work ethic on Roy; subjectively Roy's penis. I shrugged and placed the stack carefully beside me.

“I had better things to do.” Hughes smirked at my statement. “Or better people,” He quipped, standing to leave.

“Hey, Hughes, where is Roy?” Hughes crossed his eyes in his glasses and feigned innocence. “He was here while you were sleeping...oh you are just the cutest thing! Almost as cute as my Elysia..” I waited until he finished drooling at the mouth. Hughes cleared his throat and smiled.

“Riza and Roy are having a meeting. She said she really needed to tell him something.”

*************

I wondered how Hughes's face looked as I tore out of Roy's office. Maybe Riza wasn't on my side. Maybe she was going to tell all that she knew, which was a lot. Not that I didn't deserve to be outed- hell, she'd be doing me a favor. Still, it wasn't the right time. I couldn't choose between Izumi and Roy, and I damn sight didn't want any assistance in the decision. I ran down the long corridors of Central, peeking in every conference room along the way hoping to catch them.

SMACK!

Next thing I knew I was on my still tender ass, glaring up at the Crimson Alchemist. Also known as Kimblee, Shithead, Buttfucker, The child of Satan, Lucifer, Kissass, ect. There were many names for him throughout the military, but he was a dog just like the rest of us so I had no choice but to respect him. Plus, the bastard out ranked me.

“Sir, excuse me, sir for-”

“Shut up Elric.” My face reddened and my jaw clenched. I knew this bastard was going to smoke me, but I just didn't have time for that shit right now! I could do the push-ups or donkey kicks later...but not now. I needed to find Riza and make sure that my cat was not yet let out of the bag.

Kimblee looked happily over me, obviously noticing my urgency. “What's wrong, Elric? Gotta take a shit?” He teased, leaning down close to my face.

“I could smoke you right now, boy. In more ways than one,” He threatened, placing either hand on my respective shoulders. Angrily I shoved him off.

“Sir, fuck off, sir. Or else I will report you to the proper chain of command!” 'That's it...always be respectful but to the point!'

Kimblee's laugh always frightened me. It sounded like he just came from the depths of hell and was insane with levity. Or that he just smoked some fresh white and was on a serious high. He laughed at me, his hand on his washboard stomach.

“Proper chain? You mean Roy?” Kimblee rolled his eyes and stepped to the side to let me pass. “Whatever. But remember, Elric. Your ass is mine.” He gave it a brief smack before walking away, virtually disappearing around the corner. I gritted my teeth and started back down the hallway. Roy and Kimblee had something going on during the Eastern Rebellion, and that was well known, but it seemed like he had a grudge on me as well!

'He and Riza should start a club so they won't be so lonely, don't you agree?'
*************

Of course, due to Kimblee's fuckery, I arrived just in time to see Riza and Roy leaving one of the nicer conference rooms on the third floor. I ducked around the corner just as the two were walking out.

“Thank you for listening to me, Lieutenant Colonel Mustang.” Riza's voice rang in my ears and I filled with panic.

“It was not a problem, Major Hawkeye. I appreciate the matter being brought to my attention. Rest assured that it will be handled accordingly. Your loyalty will be greatly rewarded.” My breath caught in my throat. Loyalty? What about her loyalty to me???

“Thank you Lieutenant Colonel. I'll see you tomorrow, sir.” I heard footsteps walking away and I closed my eyes and sighed. I heard a click and I opened my eyes to see a shiny blue steel pistol pointed at my face.

“I spy...Edward.” Riza said in an annoyed voice.

************

“So why were you spying on me?” Riza asked calmly, gun holstered. I had no words for her outside the conference room so we went to the Mess Hall for dinner. Of course, I wasn't hungry. My stomach was in knots over what Riza could have possibly said. I didn't want to insult her and accuse her of telling, especially if she haddn't. That might inspire her to do so.

I drank a sip of my soda and met her brown eyes. ”Hughes told me you were meeting Roy about an important matter and I thought...” I trailed off and looked away. My balls had been through alot today, and decided to take an early vacation. Riza gave me a cold look and dropped her fork and pushed her tray away. She sat back, arms folded and stared at me like I was nothing. I hate that. I hate when people stare at me. Al does that when I do something wrong, and it makes me want to crawl under a rock and die.

“I told Roy about Kimblee harassing you. I saw him smoke you in the hallway in front of your unit for no reason and that wasn't right. I told Roy because coming from you, it would sound petty and stupid. Other officers have noticed his treatment of you and have made comments about him being jealous of you and Roy, but of course nothing has been confirmed, and obviously Roy is paying Kimblee no attention.”

'Well, I feel like a total jackass.'

Riza unfolded her arms and looked at me. Words weren't necessary, it was all in her face. ”I'm sorry, Riza. I had no right to assume anything.”

Riza stood and dropped her napkin on her tray, giving me one last cold and hateful look before walking away. I folded my arms on the table and put my head on my flesh arm and stared at Riza's tray, those same feelings of stupidity overwhelming me.

********

I tossed my keys on the table and I stretched as I walked into our apartment. Roy sat on the couch, watching t.v.

“Missed you today, Fullmetal.” The voice sounded flat and unemotional. I ran around the couch and faced Izumi, smiling at me.

“Why are you here?!!” I snapped, looking frantically at the door. Izumi said nothing, but took one red laquered fingernail and pressed the 'Messages' button on the answering machine.

“I missed you today, Fullmetal! Were you even on post? Listen, Riza and I talked today...I know Kimblee is bothering you. Don't worry, that maggot will cease to exist when I get finished with him. I'll be home late probably around nine or so. I've got some administrative tape to cut through with Hughes. I'll pick up some Chinese from Lo Tang's for us. I love you, Edward.” Izumi stared hatefully at me and rose to her feet.

“Don't sleep with him tonight. You know what will happen if you do.” I opened my mouth to respond, but I heard keys jingling at the front door! I turned my eyes, wide and pleading to Izumi.

“Leave!” I hissed, pushing her toward the window. She refused to budge. I panicked and pulled her toward the window and hid her behind the curtain.

“Remember what I said, Edward.”

“Shut up!” I snapped, trying to smooth down my hair and look innocent. Roy opened the door and I ran up to him, trying to block his view of anything suspicious.

“Hey! What's this?” I asked, taking the food out of his hand and spinning him away from the direction of the window. He smiled at me and gave me a soft sweet kiss before walking across the living room.

“That's the Chinese I picked up. Did you get my message? Did you already eat?” He asked, turning back to me sounding disappointed. I barely noticed him looking at me as my eyes were fused to the dark red curtains and the figure behind them. Roy gave me a strange look. He turned back toward the curtains and walked dangerously close to them before I snapped out of my daze and pulled him over toward the kitchen.

“Come here baby, I missed you!” I squealed, wrapping my arms around him. I hugged him tighter when I saw brown dreadlocks appear from behind the curtain and blue eyes glare hatefully at me. Roy began to cough and I knew I was holding too tightly.

“Ed...it's okay. I'm in for the night.” He unbuttoned his blue military jacket and tossed it on a chair, then immediately clasp his hands over his arms. “Damn Ed, you trying to run the heat bill up? Or are you just trying to shrink my balls?” He chuckled, walking back toward the windows.

“NO!” I yelled, not wanting to explain Sensei being here, hiding nonetheless. Roy walked over and closed the open window and gave me a strange look. “Okay, I'll just turn the heat down then,” He murmured, giving me an 'you-insane-teenybopper' look before walking down the hall. I broke fast over to the window and looked to my left and gasped.

Izumi has camoflauged herself into the texture and design of the building. “I'll be watching,” She hissed, and faded back into the wall. I swallowed and started to sweat. What have I gotten myself into?

'DAMNIT!!!!!!!!'