Family Therapy
2-something
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Family Therapy
Card
Sequel to Group Therapy
Which
was the sequel to Mental Therapy, Hormone Therapy & Cross-eyed.
DISCLAIMERS and CAUTIONS:
it, fifty cents and a piece of bubblegum wasn’t enough.
Luckily I own the entire Hormone Therapy world wherein Vegeta has a
uterus, so does Trunks. There is a set
of Twins, Gina and a slew of little annoying children.
I no longer feel that you MUST read Cross-eyed because it’s gotten a
1000 hits. BUT, if you want EVERYTHING
to make COMPLETE sense than you should read Hormone Therapy, Mental Therapy,
Cross-eyed and A Prince Among Men. (My
universe has gotten huge, hasn’t it?)
Okay, just about seven years and seven months (enough time for Vegeta
to be fertile again) have passed. So
there will be ‘lust-crazed’ sex with the purpose of getting people
pregnant. (Those people, mind you, are
mostly male.) So there is SLASH
(homosexuality) and there is *gasp and shudder * straight sex.
Goten. (he’s a warning all his
own.)
And this is AU. And it’s all
about humor (and the endless lemons.
Goal for this story: get a lemon in every chapter like Hormone
Therapy.)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~****
“Okay,”
Trunks said, pressed his slick palms against the table and yanking himself
(painfully) back to his feet. “This,”
he huffed, “Is obviously not working.”
Goten
was lying on his back on the lab floor, one hand on his chest lazily and the
other just flung out where it would be.
Heaving for breath and he nodded in agreement. “Right.” Didn’t look like
this acknowledgement of Trunks’ words had made it past his ears because he
looked at his mate and gave him a grin.
Damn
fucking smell.
Trunks
edged his way around the table and collapsed into the office chair that had
probably been here since Goten’s puberty and thus should probably not be sat on
by naked people. But then, Goten often
proved to be fastidious with his cleaniness.
Rather surprising really, considering just what his mate’s pastimes
were.
“So…”
Trunks said, “Just what the hell is wrong?”
Goten
made a groaning, whimpery noise and sat up.
Crossed his bare legs and turned to look at Trunks.
It’s not me though.” Like it
offended his manly twin pride for someone to insinuate that he could be to
blame for this not-getting-pregnant thing.
“Why
is it always me?” Trunks demanded.
Pouted. Crossed his arms over
his naked chest and thought vengefully about how Vegeta (the mother) was almost
to the birthing stage of his pregnancy, how Gina was starting to get pudgy and
he had yet to even get pregnant. It
wasn’t fucking fair that he had to walk around stinking and making folk horny
if there wasn’t going to be a baby out of this deal.
“Uh…Gina’s
actually a girl?” Goten said.
“Your
mother isn’t!”
“Right,
but he’s all Saiyan. You’ve got both
sides of you genetics to contend with.”
“It’s
not my fault,” Trunks said. Knew that
he was being pouty and didn’t so much mind it.
He had the right to be pouty, damn it.
A much better right than Goku (who after just one bout of sex had been
cut off again for the past month) who was just bitchy because he didn’t get
any. Trunks was getting too much.
weeks.
“Are
you sure you’re not pregnant?” Goten asked.
Gave him that look.
“I
still stink,” Trunks pointed out.
“AHHHHHHH!”
his eyes shortly after appearing and promptly turned tail and said: “Why do you
have to be naked all the time?”
“Bardock,
it’s perfectly fine to be naked.”
“Right,
but not when you’ve got…fluids…on your naked self.”
Stupid
child, Trunks tht wit with a shake of his head, grabbed his long shirt off the
table and pulled it on over his head.
Goten however looked down at his chest and his stomach and then said:
“Huh.
effect, running his hands through the mess and licking it (noisily) off his
fingers until Bardock was blushio bao badly the back of his neck was the color
of a cherry.
“Did
you need something?” Trunks asked. Sat
down in the chair with his tail wrapped around his waist so the shirt stayed
down and covered all the important bits.
(Pants were just pointless at this juncture.)
“Uh…I
can’t remember.”
Goten
stopped making an nuisance of himself as he tapped his hand over the scar on
his arm, repeatedly. Quickly.
pants and pulled them on with a truly amazing show of skill (He had but one
hand to do this feat) and then he disappeared.
~~~***
Now I can have sex again!” Like
this was the important part of the birth of his newest siblings.
was bad for his father’s mind. Perhaps
the problem isn’t that he wasn’t getting enough, but too much.
would end with him getting beaten so he figured that he’d just stand there, tap
his hand and wait for Goten.)
“We
got babies?” Goten said as he appeared.
Questionably attired in pants that were not closed and stuff on his
stomach and his chest that didn’t exactly take a genius to figure out.
that gave Vegeta a migraine. (It could
be the male sex smell of the fact that he could actually smell, in detail, the
actual labor process occurring in his mother’s body.)
“None
yet,” he said. Sniffed again, looked at
his brother and then at his mother who was looking at their father like he was
planning how best to decapitate him without having to move.
arm and shared (that was a new skill of theirs) the extra sensitive sense of
smell. In turn got Goten’s extraordinary
sense of hearing. (That was no
fun.) “Is that a normal smell?”
Goten
however, was looking down at himself with a grimace. “Man, I do smell bad. I
think I need a shower.”
“Babies!”
their dad said, happily bounced around the room getting the blankets for the
babies and the supplies and everything else.
Happy. Thrilled.
had never been happy about this birthing thing because he got stuck with the
placenta-removing part.
“Yeah,”
Goten said finally, “That doesn’t smell quite right.” Then he jumped on the bed (always a scary proposition with a
pregnant mom on the bed.) Laid down
next to Vegeta then rested his head on the rounded stomach that was contracting
even as they watched. (Or as Goten
listened.) He listened for a moment,
tapped his finger against his thigh for a long while and then grinned
broadly. Sat up.
“What?”
Mom demanded.
“Oh.”
you?”
“WHY?”
that was Dad. He finally fell out of
that stupid hopping about the house place.
“Why did you say that?”
“You’ll
find out.” Then Goten hopped off the
bed again, grabbed Vegeta and dragged the two of them out of the room.
~~~***
“If
I had known,” Vegeta (pregnant woman in labor) growled, “That is how he turned
out,” had to stop to pant, “I would never have let him out.”
“You
mean, like out of your body?”
Vegeta
was so glad he picked the real brainer for his mate. Damn. Even now.
ever amazibilibility to be TRULY MORONIC.
He would have glared, but as it were, he was more preoccupied with the
increasing pressure against his hips, and the ever-present realization that his
hips just were not wide enough to be doing this. His mate, helpfully, was holding his legs up and spread as he
hummed his little happy ditty and if that bastard thought he was ever doing
anything of any sort of sexual ne hee he was absolutely wrong.
“Nothing’s
happening,” Kakarot informed him.
Maybe
he would kill him. Soon.
thing. Strange, that urge to push.
pressure down there or some sort of instinctual thing.
were really all that interested in pushing anything, but he always seemed to
know that now was the time to bear down.
Weird.
AND
the child had KAKAROT’S GIANT THICK HEAD.
That was all he had to say.
“Ooh!”
Kakarot said, all happily, “Hair!”
He
was thrilled. Took over holding his own
leg out as Kakarot dropped one of his hands down to do whatever the hell it was
that he did, and Vegeta panted for a moment as the contraction passed.
but something didn’t feel right as the pain came again and he pushed.
finally stopped that stupid fucking humming.
“Vegeta,
its not moving.”
He
smacked the hand off his other knee and rolled over onto his stomach—why?
teeth hard, stretched his body and pushed.
Had his knees pulled up as he dug his hands into the mattress under
him. It would figure!
“Vegeta,
I don’t know what to do.”
Oh.
Stop being comforting, it wasn’t like he was TRYING TO DO SOMETHING
HERE! HE didn’t have the breath to
bitch however, there was just the unbelievable need to get the child out of him
and he could feel that it wasn’t moving.
Trusted that within moments the answer would either pop into one of
their heads or one of their idiot children would show up.
“I’m
gonna get Goten,” Goku said.
Great.
But at this point, he was willing to do anything, because there was
something not right and his hips were starting to hurt like hell as well as the
pain that was moving from his stomach to his back.
There
was the sound of popping again and his mate climbed onto the bed next to
him. “It’s okay, Vegeta,” he
whispered. Rubbed his back, and if his
hands had been anywhere near his mouth, Vegeta would have bit him.
Goten
made a noise of disbelief or whatever and said: “This is probably going to scar
me for life and feel a bit…not good.”
Then he actually… Well.
ever, and Goten probably would never tell a soul, so the secret was safe with
them, but when it was all said and done, there was a squalling child screaming
and howling, and Kakarot rolled him back onto his back and wiped his face clean
as Goten (with the air of an expert, and he had never been happier for his
son’s detachable emotions as he was in that moment) clamped and cut the
cord. Wiped the baby clean and shook
his head at him. (It was then that he
noticed his son was now wearing a clean shirt (formerly clean) and medical
gloves.) “Look,” Goten said, grinned
broadly as he turned the baby around to face him.
“A
GIRL?!” Kakarot shouted.
Oh.
Figures.
“Yeah,”
Goten said, “You might have cracked your pelvic bone. Sorry. Want me to stick
around make sure the other… Make sure
the rest of it goes okay?” He kindly
moved out of the way to let his father take over when it concerned the
placenta, handed the baby to Vegeta and patted her little head.
“No,”
Vegeta said, tiredly. He was pretty
damn tired. “You can go.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~****
Alright,
for anyone who is like: what was up with the baby? The answer is “Shoulder dystocia” (that spelling is so wrong) its
when the baby’s shoulders are actually broader than the pelvic bone is
wide. Thus he/she gets stuck on their
way out. Thusly (I saw this on the
discovery channel) Goten had to kind of wiggle the kid past the bone, or turn
her a little so she could get her shoulders out. I got the idea from ‘Birth Day’ and a woman who was having a home
birth with a mid-wife. So.
Goten: I
need therapy now.
Lil’Geta:
Which sort? We have Hormone,
Mental, Group and now Family.
Goten: Oi.
mso-bidi-font-size:12.0pt'>Vegeta: Does
the new baby get a name?
Goku:
Sure. And then we get sex!
Webtester 01:
Lol.
Jaygoose:
cla class=MsoNormal style='line-height:150%'> Yes,
my older brothers are pervs. But as far
as I know they never tried to kiss their…no.
*thinks for a moment * I think
my brother did kiss my cousin actually.
But he was only four or so at the time, so its okay.
Macha:
Lol.
And that was mean of the twins, a bit.
Oh well. I would have been
disappointed if they had done anything less.
Gemini:
Wow.
keep going. Silly.
ALRIGHT FOLK:
(This is me pimping my originals here):
I AM PUBLISHED.
(Yeah, don’t clap it’s just an Internet magazine thing)
if you would pass this site along to anyone that would be even stly
tly
interested in original fiction. *pleady
puppy eyes *
The website is :
And my story there is “When Real Begets the Unreal.”
Its in the ‘horror’ section since its about vampires.
Please pass along the site. It’s
brandnew. Just started last November.