school adversary

Part 21

I sat in the sterile waiting room, my eyes never leaving the door that the still form of Duo had disappeared through. Heero sat beside me, his head in his hands. After what seemed like hours, I couldn't take the silence any more.

"He's going to be OK." I said to Heero, or to myself. At this point, it didn't matter anymore. I just needed reassurance, any reassurance, that Duo would be alright. Heero lifted his head and looked at me.

"Is he?" He asked. Then, he shook his head and looked down at his clasped hands. "I keep telling myself that, but I don't know if it's true."

"Of course he shall be OK." I said to him. "He must be OK. It would be unjust for it to be otherwise."

"Yeah, well sometimes life is 'unjust'." Heero replied bitterly.

"What do you mean?" I asked him, unsure as to whether I wanted to know the answer.

"I saw the way he looked at you." He said, his dark Prussian eyes boring into mine. "The way he ran after you when you raced out of the room like the four horsemen of the apocalypse were after you. He loves you, and I saw they way you looked at him. You love him as well. And that's just great isn't it? You love him, he loves you, life is peachy. Except for me."

Anger rose within me at this little speech. "Well, in case you forgot, he chose you, Yuy! He chose you over me. Yes, I love him, more than you could ever know, and he told me he loved me, numerous times, but it was you he chose." Saying it out loud like that...it only made it more real.

"Are you insane?" He asked me. "I saw the way he looked at you Wufei! I saw the way his eyes lighted up when they landed on you. Not that I blame him. You are one of the most beautiful people I have ever seen." Heero continued to stare at me, but now his gaze held something apart from accusations.
Something like want, or desire or need. I was caught in that Prussian gaze, like a deer in headlights.

"Wh-what?" I asked, slightly gobsmacked.

"You are on of the most beautiful people I've ever seen Wufei. Yet, you are still so strong and sure of yourself, so intelligent and kind. Wufei, I've always thought you were attractive, but it hasn't been until recently that I've felt attracted to you. I love Duo, Wufei, so how can I feel these things about you?"

I shook my head, not believing what I was hearing. Heero was attracted to me? Was this a blessing in disguise? Was God somehow giving with one hand, while taking with the other? That thought came completely unbidden to my mind, and the idea that Duo would leave was something I pushed away
immediately. Duo *would* be OK.

"I don't know how Heero. All I know is that I feel attracted to you to. Despite the fact that I should hate you for all the dishonorable things you have done to Duo. I can't help it, and I know I shouldn't be feeling these things towards you, especially when we don't know what will happen to Duo, but I just...I think I need you Heero." The confession was given hesitantly. I was not sure what his response to such and admission would mean, and it was so hard to think when you were drowning in fathomless pools of Prussian.

"I don't know what's happening to me Wufei. I'm so confused, but I think I need you too. Do you think that that's wrong? Wanting two different people at once?"

"I don't know." I answered honestly. "I can only follow my heart and hope that it doesn't lead me astray."

Heero's face, gaunt from an inner turmoil I could not even guess at, was so close, and so lovely. My eyes were still locked onto his, but our mouths were getting closer, as if pulled together by an invisible wire. We were merely a kiss apart now, and we were drawing closer still. I knew what was about to
happen, and thrills of excitement ran rampant through me, chased by tremors of apprehension and followed by ripples of guilt. Was this wrong? Would Duo hate me if I had an affair with his lover? Would he hate Heero? Would he leave us both? We were only a hairsbreadth away from kissing now.
The door opened loudly. We both jumped and whirled out of our seats to face Duo's doctor, Dr. G.
He was looking at his notebook as he came in, and so he had missed what he had almost walked in on. Heero and I looked anxiously at him, hoping for the best, but fearing for the worst.

"How's Duo?" I asked at the same time Heero said: "How's he doing?"

Dr. G chuckled at our overlapping remarks. "Duo is fine. He has a slight concussion and some bruises, so we'll be keeping him overnight for observation. He should be fine to go home tomorrow around lunchtime. If anything happens though, we'll call you immediately. I suggest you both go home and get
some rest."

Dr. G turned to leave. "Can we see him?" I asked him pleadingly.

He turned back around. "He's sleeping at the moment under the influence of a mild sedative. Sleep's the best thing for him at the moment. You can see him tomorrow. He's not going anywhere." Then Dr. G left the waiting room.

_.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._.-._

Wufei drove us to his home in Quatre's blue convertible. We had decided that I would spend the night at his house as that was where the hospital would be calling. I could sleep in Duo's room for the night.
I looked over at Wufei during the ride, trying to figure out what had happened back at the hospital. I knew that I thought Wufei was beautiful, but I didn't realize that I was attracted to him until I had seen the pain in his eyes just before he had run out of the house earlier that day. That pain had sent an answering one through my system, and I realized then that I felt something for Wufei. Maybe not as strong as what I felt for Duo, but then I hadn't allowed time for it to grow yet. Did I want to allow time for it to grow? I didn't know anymore! The simple life I had had just a month ago was now a distant memory, and things seemed to only be getting more complicated.

Why was I having all these feelings now? I sneaked a glance at Wufei again. He seemed to have focused his entire attention on the road ahead. I drank in his profile, noting how strong it was. He was a noble, honorable, intelligent, athletic, beautiful guy so maybe it was normal for me to have feelings for him. But there were plenty of gorgeous guys around that I wasn't attracted to. Trowa was quite handsome and I had never gotten the urge to jump *him*.

We arrived at Wufei's house all too soon as I was not looking forward to facing him with this roil of unsorted emotions. We got inside and wandered into the living room where we sat down on opposite
ends of the couch. I looked at Wufei, and he looked at me. Our gazes collided, my Prussian into his chocolate, and I felt my mouth go dry. How could he have such a strong affect on me when I loved Duo? His eyes seemed to be asking me the same question as his gaze was full of frustration towards
himself and need for me. I felt warm inside knowing that I was needed.

Years of parental neglect had left me with the feeling that nobody could really ever want to spend time around me when they could be doing something better, and that was another reason why I had felt such fear at Duo's admission of love. But I cared about Wufei, maybe not love, but I definitely cared. Would it be so wrong if I kissed him? If we kissed each other? Held each other? Caressed each other? Maybe it would, maybe it wouldn't. All I could do now was let my feelings dictate the moment. Let my emotions, my heart, tell me what I should be doing. After all, my feelings had gotten me into this mess, they could damn well get me back out of it. I moved closer to Wufei, still keeping our eyes locked. He stared at me like a dear caught in a car's headlights and pressed himself against the arm of the couch.

"Heero, about what happened earlier..."

"What happened earlier?" I murmured, still moving closer.

"Uh, you know, when we almost...uh, *nervous swallow* kissed."

"Did we?" I asked. My thigh was touching his now, and I moved so that they were pressed together all the way down. Wufei tried to go further backwards, but he had no where else to go. My face was about a foot away from his now, and I was still getting closer. Wufei seemed to pull himself together.

He looked at me, determined. "Now look Yuy-"

"Call me Heero."

"Heero. Duo's in the hospital. That you could even think of kissing me at a time like this is completely dishonorable, not only to him, but to me and yourself as well. The way you could move from him
to me is unjust, especially as he just forgave you for-" I cut him off with my mouth.