Afterimages

Wufei returned from work to an amazing sight. Duo was standing in the living room, radio blaring, amid shifted furniture. Seemingly oblivious to the Chinese pilot’s presence, he began to navigate his way through the room at a brisk pace. Twice, he came close to walking into a piece of furniture only to sidestep it at the last possible moment.

Still ignoring his friend in the doorway, Duo continued wandering around the room, leaving his raven-haired companion to watch him in confusion, wondering if he had lost his mind. Out of nowhere, Shini ran towards the braided teen, purring loudly as she launched herself into the air. Balanced carefully on his toes, Duo pivoted in time to snag the miniature cat midair, his searching fingers only bumping the feline’s forelegs gently as he caught her. Immediately, Duo placed the cat on her preferred perch on his shoulder. Spinning, she launched herself forward, meowing loudly just beyond the peak of her jump. In response, Duo lunged forward, catching her gently in mid-fall.

Setting the cat gently on the floor, Duo moved unerringly towards the radio, flicking it off as he angled his head to turn his clear violet eyes on Wufei.

“Hi, Wu!” Duo greeted enthusiastically. Wufei just stared, confused and slightly fearing the mental state of his companion.

“Duo… what…”

Duo grinned unabashedly at him, seemingly amused at his discomfort.

“Thought that I should be able to move around at the party, ya know?” Duo laughed, bouncing forward to embrace the stunned Chinese teen. He continued, sensing the shock radiating from the other boy. “I’ve finally learned to sense where large objects are, even with loud noises around so I don’t run into them anymore. And I trained Shini to run around and make noise at varying volumes. I’m beginning to be able to catch her…”

Duo trailed off, looking uncertain. Wufei didn’t give him a chance to falter further.

“Did you do all of this simply because I asked you to sing?” Wufei asked softly, purposefully returning the embrace. At the jerky nod against his shoulder, he plowed on. “Why didn’t you say anything? I could have helped.”

“I didn’t know if I could manage it,” Duo admitted softly, turning his head away and lowering his eyes. “I didn’t want to disappoint you. Get your hopes up…”

Wufei’s heart nearly seized at the gesture. If he hadn’t known better, he would never have guessed that Duo was blind. He gripped the slender man tighter.

“Please,” Wufei pleaded softly. “Tell me how to help. I don’t know what to do.”

Duo raised his head mere inches from where it had been pillowed on the Chinese pilot’s shoulder. A few soft breaths sounded in Wufei’s ear before the braided pilot was able to relay his request. Wufei balked for a moment before agreeing to the odd request. He sank to the sofa with the uncertain braided teen in his arms, resolving to do as requested once his companion had calmed down.

After several hours, the American finally dozed off. Carefully shifting the taller boy’s weight to the couch, Wufei reached for the phone, carefully dialing in a few calls.

* * *

Duo squirmed almost continuously, fingers endlessly fiddling with his hair or clothes. For at least the tenth time, Wufei reached across his car to still his friend’s fidgeting hands and got a sheepish smile in return.

“Relax,” Wufei soothed. “Everyone will be happy to see you again. Besides, you won’t be up on stage forever. We secured two other victims to sing so you could go out and mingle.” Duo nodded slightly.

“Who else?”

“The scrawny little German guy from accounting, Kurt… Wagner, I think. He’s about our age, if I remember correctly. You know, the guy that walks a bit strangely, like his legs aren’t jointed right. The other one is the strange guy that insists on working the graveyard shift, Shido. Says he has an allergy to sunlight.”

“The nightwalker himself? Isn’t he the lavender haired guy that’s doing the nasty with his secretary?” Duo asked, face mischievous.

“That’s him,” Wufei confirmed. “And we can’t confirm that bit of rumor, despite the number of hickies she constantly has. We just let him stay on because he’s so good at figuring out the clues on some of the odder cases that stump most of the department.”

Duo nodded absently, fazing out again. Wufei sighed and wondered if he should keep pushing Duo to be cheerful or just let him fret. He decided to go with both, reaching out to hold Duo’s hand, offering comfort and understanding while not pressuring him to speak.

Caught up in holding the braided teen’s hand, Wufei was shocked when he realized they had arrived at the Preventers Headquarters. He shook his head ruefully at his absentmindedness.

Helping Duo out of the vehicle, Wufei placed his friend’s hand on his shoulder, not knowing if the blind pilot would be comfortable with displays of public affection yet. Duo followed him complacently, his head swiveling occasionally towards sounds.

“Relax,” Wufei said. “You’re not even the first one to sing. At the moment, I believe they have Mr. Wagner up on stage.”

“I’m almost afraid to hear him singing with his accent as heavy as it is,” Duo chuckled. “I’m up after him, aren’t I?”

“Correct,” Wufei chuckled. “Just remember what we talked about. No Valby.”

“Fine, fine,” Duo consented, grinning. “No Valby.”

“Good boy. I’ll give you a cookie later.”

Duo snorted, slipping his free hand into his pocket and pulling out something he had snuck with him into his palm. Trying to remain inconspicuous, Duo slipped behind Wufei to stand on his other side, placing his hand on the Chinese pilot’s shoulder. Sensing a confused look directed at him, he shrugged.

“Arm cramp,” he lied, keeping his expression innocent.

“Ah.”

Duo bit the inside of his lip to keep from grinning. He knew for a fact that most of Wufei’s wardrobe was white and the button down shirt he was wearing was probably no exception. In his palm, the braided pilot had a large mass of fur he had brushed out of Shini’s coat. Sliding his hand across and down Wufei’s back, he settled his arm around his companion’s waist, hugging him, leaving a streak of black fur across the other’s back. Wufei made a surprised noise in his throat, but didn’t object. Later, he would rant when he knew what Duo had done.

In a final act of mayhem, Duo balled his fist around the remaining fur, coating his fingers with the silky stuff. He dropped his hand and firmly squeezed Wufei’s butt cheek, leaving a hand-shaped spotting of fur on what he suspected were beige slacks.

“Lets go greet the crowds,” Duo crowed before the Chinese pilot could more than gasp in shock.

Laughing, Duo bounced ahead, navigating easily into the building and to the main auditorium where the party was taking place. Wufei watched in shock as the blind young man successfully navigated around all of the other guests without running into anyone or anything. He paused a few times to exchange a quick word with some of the other employees, often assurances that he was okay. Quatre spotted and cornered him almost immediately. Wufei hurriedly joined them.

“Duo! I’m so glad you made it! I’ve missed you. I heard you were singing tonight. Is that true?” Quatre said all in one breath, sounding like he had consumed entirely too much caffeine.

Duo blinked in shock at the onslaught and then grinned, adopting a Southern Bell accent.

“Quatre! It is just lovely to talk to you again,” Duo said, raising one hand to touch his fingertips to his collarbone and holding the other out delicately towards the blond. Still grinning mischievously, he embraced Quatre lightly and kissed him on each cheek before pulling back and giving in to the urge to laugh. Quatre shook his head and chuckled.

“Wufei, I believe you need to take the sugar out of his diet,” he said ruefully, glancing at the Chinese pilot.

Wufei bit down on his tongue. Hard. Apparently, Duo was wearing lipstick and due to his antics, so was Quatre, though the blond didn’t know it yet. He glanced at the grinning brunette, still unable to see the makeup. Somehow, he had found a tone the exact shade of his lips and while it didn’t show up on him at all, it appeared almost fluorescent on the blonde’s pale skin. Wufei leaned over to whisper in Duo’s ear.

“I don’t know where you got that, but you better not get any on me,” he warned.

“Quatre, Wu, excuse me for a minute,” Duo said. “There’s something I have to do before I’m dragged onto stage in a few minutes.”

“Okay,” Quatre agreed, sounding confused.

Winking at them, Duo turned and began hunting, knowing where his target would be waiting for him. Slipping just out of the auditorium and towards one of the nearby offices, he tried to calm down before he got there. He concentrated on the music, hearing Kurt doing his rendition of More Human Than Human by White Zombie. He wasn’t slaughtering it quite as badly as Duo thought he would. For some reason, though, it seemed strange that he was singing that particular song.

Shrugging, he entered the small office that belonged to some violent, sword-wielding, redheaded psycho named Aya. He was careful not to touch anything. It was quite possible that the weirdo had booby-trapped his office. He sensed someone was already in there.

“Hello, Trowa,” he greeted.

“Hello,” Trowa returned in a subdued voice. “Duo, I’m sorry…”

“Quiet,” Duo ordered, sighing. He could sense the European pilot staring at his blank eyes and it bothered him. “I don’t want to hear apologies. Logically, I know it wasn’t your fault. I’ll speak to Quatre after I get off the stage. I’m due up there in a few minutes.”

“You’re going to be singing?” Trowa asked incredulously, his mind already overloaded from Duo’s unspoken forgiveness. He shook his head, moving back to important matters. “I know you don’t want me to say it Duo, but I am sorry. If there’s anything I can do…”

“Actually,” Duo interrupted, smirking. “There is.”

* * *

Duo sauntered up to the stage, still in shock that Kurt had dared to sing ‘Walking in a Winter Wonderland’ with his thick German accent. It had come out ‘Valking in a Vinter Vonderland.’ Wincing slightly to himself, he walked over to where he believed the microphone to be, having to sweep his arm once to find it’s exact location. He didn’t bother to introduce himself or give the crowd any warning of what was coming. Whispering to the band behind him what to play, he launched right into his version of the song the German man had just sung.

“Lacy things, the wife is missing. Didn’t ask for her permission. I’m wearing her clothes, her silk pantyhose. Walking round in women’s underwear.” By this time, the room had become dead silent. Duo could sense countless sets of eyes staring at him in shock. Smirking, he continued with the song. “In the store, there’s a teddy, with little straps like spaghetti. It holds me so tight, like handcuffs at night. Walking round in women’s underwear.”

By the time he had finished the spoof, he could almost feel the heat from Wufei’s blush. At the final notes, a deafening cheer arose from the Preventers at the party. Technically the Chinese man couldn’t say anything about his choice of songs. He had never said not to sing any parodies. More accurately, he had only said not to sing anything by Valby, Wufei thinking it far to perverted to even exist, much less sing at a party. Smirking, he launched into his second song of his block singing. He knew he would probably end up on stage again later in the night, but that didn’t bother him in the slightest. He knew a lot of weird songs. His second selection was techno, and strange even by his standards. The band had to quickly download his choice and play it for the first time from hurriedly printed pages.

“Rioja, Rioja, Reverend Al Green, deep blue morocco. The water on stone, the water on concrete, the water on sand, the water on fire. Smoke, the wind, the salt, the bride boat coming. Dave in the water. Old man Einstein on top of his house. White deep blue…”

The lyrics continued in that vein for some time, making absolutely no sense in the slightest. Despite the oddity of the song, he received another round of whistles and cheers. For another dozen songs, he chose oddities that no one sane would have ever heard of, let alone listened to.

“We sail tonight to Singapore. We’re all as mad as hatters here…”

His hour was almost up. By this time, he chose to assume he had given Trowa enough time to comply with his request. After telling the band his final choice, he received a round of chuckles from the musicians. They suspected he was up to something. Grinning, he turned back to his audience to begin his song, the words beginning long before the music, reflecting that the band was right to be suspicious. The introduction was fast paced and only lasted a few seconds before the music kicked in. Duo couldn’t help grinning like a madman as he entered the refrain for the first time, knowing what would happen when he did.

“Oh yes they call him the streak. Fastest thing on two feet. He’s just as proud as he can be, of his anatomy. He gonna give us a peek. Oh yes they call him the streak. He likes to show off his physique. If there’s an audience to be found, he’ll be streakin’ it round, inviting public critique.”

That’s when Duo heard the first set of gasps and shrieks. He was hard pressed not to mess up his lines as he plowed through the song. Several of the musicians missed a note or two behind him, distracted by the scene in the crowd.

As per Duo’s request, at the first line of the refrain, Trowa charged into the room, wearing nothing more than his shoes. Following instructions, he made a beeline for Une, circling her twice before dashing through the Preventers once more, looking for his next target. Une’s roar of “Barton!” was lost in the laughter and cacophony of catcalls. Seeing Zechs, Trowa charged at a full sprint, briefly placing his hands on the blonde’s shoulders as he hopped over him leapfrog style. Marquise snorted his drink out his nose and sputtered indignantly when he saw the younger man’s butt cheeks in front of him awarding him a full view of something he never wanted to see.

“Oh yes they call him the streak. He likes to turn the other cheek. He’s always making the news, wearing just his tennis shoes. Yes you could call him unique.”

Only half understanding the joke, Trowa circled Noin a few times, depositing a note in her hands that read only ‘It was tournament certified’ and had no following explanation. Even though Trowa didn’t understand it, Noin apparently did, seeing as to how the shriek of “Barton!” followed him as he made his exit. The cry may have been for the streaking alone, but considering the hostility in which it was said, he suspected that there was more to it.

While Duo continued on with the song, Trowa managed to find Wufei and Quatre, circling the two at a rapid pace, very aware that his face was crimson. At the nasal sputtering, he suspected that Wufei had suffered another nosebleed, but didn’t slow down to verify the fact. He had completed the list of people to torment and was headed for the exit that led to his clothes. It was blocked. Several Preventers, far too amused with the situation, had cut off his escape route. Doubling back, Trowa ran for the nearest exit, only to find it blocked similarly. After making a dash for every possible way out, finding each summarily obstructed, the European pilot went for the one route that could not be thwarted by the partygoers. The vents. Scurrying up a wall, in the process flashing all his goods to the entire crowd, he popped off the cover to a vent and disappeared from the party. A mixture of applause and raucous laughter followed his escape.

Duo finished off the song just as Trowa’s pale butt disappeared from view. The applause was deafening and lasted for several minutes. After basking in the cheers, he relinquished the stage to Shido Tatsuhiko. The lavender-haired detective started immediately into a series of love songs, a vast change from the chaos Duo had been wreaking.

It took a few tries at navigating the crowds, but Duo eventually located where Wufei and Quatre were by their voices. They were speaking in low tones not meant to carry. Duo picked them up a little ways into their conversation. It was clear that they hadn’t noticed his approach.

“I only called him because Duo insisted!” Wufei said firmly.

“Why would he do that?” Quatre asked, sounding frustrated. “Duo couldn’t have been in his right mind when he asked you to call him. If it weren’t for Trowa…”

“Then it would have happened a week later than it did,” Duo interrupted. The previously arguing pilots went silent, at a loss for words. Duo casually stepped up and slung one hand across Quatre’s shoulders. “Come with me. I need to talk to you for a minute.”

“Okay,” the blond said reluctantly, allowing himself to be dragged. For loss of a better private location, they ended up in Aya’s office again, narrowly avoiding hearing Shido begin another love song as he openly flirted with everything female in the audience. Duo released his near chokehold on his companion and leaned against the nearest wall. He began speaking before the Arabian could gather his wits.

“First and foremost, it’s not Trowa’s fault,” Duo said bluntly. He raised one hand to silence the forthcoming protests. “I’ve acted like a delinquent so often in the past that he assumed I was either pulling a prank or doing something decidedly illegal. Again. He didn’t know.”

“But you said that you were begging…”

“I was,” Duo admitted, starting to sound strained. “But he didn’t know what it was about, only that Heero was involved. He didn’t know I was hurt.”

“That’s no reason for…”

Duo cut him off again. “He told me to buzz off because I asked to stay there. I’m sure you remember the last time I stayed over. He was trying to protect you.”

Quatre was silent as he contemplated the situation. The last time Duo had stayed with them was the only time he had ever been allowed in their house. After that, he had not returned. Though he had known, or at least suspected, during the war that Quatre and Trowa were together, he had never had any concrete proof. During a vacation at one of Quatre’s estates, he had accidentally walked in on the two of them together. He left the room very quickly. The next day, being the joker he was, he made a few jokes at their expense. He had never intended to upset Quatre so badly. Seeing his lover upset, Trowa had thrown Duo out, barely refraining from doing so physically.

After thinking on the subject for a few minutes, the Arabian tentatively asked a question.

“You aren’t upset by us being together?”

Duo snorted. “Go hide in the corner,” he said, pointing towards the back of Aya’s office. “Make sure you can’t be seen. I’ll be back in a minute. Stay hidden.”

When he heard the blond doing what he said, confusion pouring from his very being so strongly that Duo could clearly sense it, the American slipped out the door and back to the party. Wufei was almost exactly where he had been before, talking quietly with some colleague that Duo couldn’t place right off. He butted into the conversation softly.

“Sorry, man. I have to steal Wufei for a moment,” Duo said, snagging the Chinese man’s shoulder and tugging gently.

“Sure thing, Duo. I’ll find him later,” the mystery voice said as they left. The tone was so cocky and arrogant that Duo finally recognized him, grinning and waving back.

“Later, Yusuke,” he called over his shoulder.

“What is this about?” Wufei asked, tensing up in preparation for a fight.

“You’ll see when we get where we’re going,” Duo said, grinning. Sensing his good mood, Wufei allowed himself to relax. He immediately stiffened again when the American made to pull him into Aya’s office.

“I wouldn’t recommend going in there,” he said tersely.

“It’s okay,” Duo said offhandedly. “I’ve been in here a couple of times tonight. If there were any booby traps, Trowa already disabled them.”

“I guess,” Wufei said dubiously. “Now why are we here?”

Duo only closed the door with a quiet snick. Grinning, he pushed Wufei against the nearest wall. Pulling the Chinese pilot’s chin up while he was too startled to respond, he lowered his own mouth to the shorter man’s. He kept the kiss gentle at first, waiting a few seconds before swiping his tongue along Wufei’s lower lip. Duo heard him suck in a breath as he broke the kiss.

“What is it?” Duo asked.

“Aya,” he panted. “The man has cameras in his office.”

“Lets give him a thrill then.”

“I don’t think that… mmph.”

Whatever else he had to say was lost in Duo’s mouth. The brunette happily plundered his mouth with his tongue so thoroughly that Wufei was jealous of whoever had taught him to kiss like that. He decided to worry about it later, focusing on the American’s wandering hands, which were playing near his lower back and threatening to go lower. Feeling bold, Wufei lowered his own hands to grab Duo’s ass and pull him forward, pressing their groins together. Duo chuckled into his mouth.

“I said to give him a thrill, not a heart attack,” he said wryly.

“Are you kidding?” Wufei said, slightly out of breath. “We couldn’t freak him out easily. He’s with Wagner.”

“Seriously? Man, there has to be something in the water here,” Duo murmured. He cocked his head slightly. “Sounds like said playboy just started a song with Shido. White Christmas. Perfect. Why does Wagner keep choosing songs with W in them?”

“We should probably get back out there,” Wufei said regretfully, ignoring the taller man’s commentary. He had no idea what had come over Duo, but he definitely wasn’t objecting.

“Actually, could you go out and send Trowa this way for me?”

“Sure,” Wufei said slowly. “But if you got any lipstick on me, I’ll get you later.”

“Thanks.” Duo waited until he heard the door close behind his boyfriend before speaking again. “You can close your mouth now, Quatre.”

Quatre snapped his teeth shut, unaware that he had be staring at the two of them slack-jawed. He grasped for the first thing that his shocked mind could handle at that moment.

“Lipstick?” he asked. Aquamarine eyes narrowed as he raised one hand suspiciously to his cheek, drawing his fingers through the pink marks the American had left there earlier in the evening. He couldn’t help it. He chuckled. “Well. That explains a lot.” His voice toned down a bit. “You and Wufei? When did that happen?”

“About a week ago, actually,” Duo admitted. “Anyways, time for you to get ready to make nice. Trowa’s here.”

Quatre glanced at the door, frowning. “But…”

“No buts. You are going to make nice if I have to slip you both aphrodisiacs and lock you in the closet,” Duo growled. Quatre snorted.

“I was going to ask you how you could tell,” the Arabian said.

“Oh,” Duo said, grinning sheepishly. “I can hear him. He’s just outside.”

Hearing the conversation and knowing he had been caught, Trowa slipped into the room, staring at the floor.

“Duo, I…”

“No talking!” Duo interrupted. “Now. Horizontal Hokey Pokey. That’s an order. If Aya doesn’t have a seizure, I’m coming after both of you with fuzzy handcuffs and a whip. Understood?”

Not waiting for a response, Duo exited the room and made his way towards the stage to temporarily take over for the length of one song. As a deliberate reminder to a certain couple, he sang the Hokey Pokey. In a previously private office, Trowa and Quatre laughed.

* * *

Hoping that his rendition of the Hokey Pokey had reached the proper ears, Duo hopped off the front of the stage, leaving a grinning Kurt in his wake.

“Fellow Preventers,” Wagner called upon his exit. “Thank Duo for sparing you from my singing for the last few minutes.” He paused to allow a smattering of cheers. “Now, you may blame him for getting me in this particular mindset.” Grinning at the audience, silently pleased at their worried looks, he produced an accordion out of thin air and launched directly into the Chicken Dance.

Weaving between laughing and dancing Preventers, Duo made his way to where Wufei had spent most of the night, predictably finding the Chinese pilot waiting for him.

“I trust Winner enjoyed the show,” Wufei drawled before Duo had the chance to open his mouth. The American had the grace to blush.

“You knew he was there?”

“Maxwell, even if I hadn’t seen him leave with you before you returned alone, did you really think that I wouldn’t notice someone else in the room?” Wufei asked wryly.

“You’re not mad?” Duo asked hopefully.

“Of course I’m mad,” Wufei said flatly. Duo wilted slightly. “And as punishment, tonight you will receive a spanking.” Duo couldn’t help it, he laughed.

“And how is that supposed to encourage me to behave?”

“Who said it was?” Wufei countered.

“You know,” Duo mulled. “Quatre and Trowa are probably scarring Aya for life even as we speak.”

“That would be your fault,” Wufei said dryly. “So what exactly is your point?”

“I believe that Kurt has a camera in his office too.”

Laughing softly, Wufei escorted Duo to the German man’s office. Little did they know that the following day, Aya and Kurt compared surveillance tapes. The four pilots never did figure out who sent them the fruit baskets a week later.

* * *

Duo barely managed to make it back to the stage for his final singing block of the night. Wufei met Quatre and Trowa in the audience, all the men looking rumpled but content.

Much to everyone’s surprise, Duo suddenly began mimicking Shido’s singing style, going through nothing but love songs. Even strange to them, none of the songs were in English, sticking solely with Chinese, Arabian and Latin. The three listening Gundam pilots were the only ones to understand, though Zechs, Noin and Une seemed to get the gist of it judging by their smirks. Duo had just started a fast paced song in Chinese when Zechs called out to him.

“Sing something in English!” he yelled, amused. Without missing a beat, Duo slipped between languages from one line to the next seamlessly. Noin chuckled.

“You can’t win,” she said quietly to Zechs.

“Oh yeah,” he whispered back challengingly. “Lets see you do it in German!”

Waving in the blonde’s direction, Duo hopped languages again, this time in the middle of a phrase. Quiet laughter circulated the room at Zechs’s expense, along with a few appreciative murmurs. Noin was one of the latter.

“Zechs,” she hissed demandingly. “Listen to him!”

“What?” Zechs asked dumbly, trying to tune into the song at her demand. Ice blue eyes widened slightly. “He speaks German.”

“He speaks German,” Noin repeated flatly. “And since he translated it from the original song, I’d bet he speaks Chinese too. I don’t think he just memorized the translations.”

“Are you implying that he speaks Arabic and Latin too?” Zechs asked incredulously.

“Possibly,” Noin mulled quietly before speaking up. “Spanish!” Again, Duo shifted immediately to accommodate her request. Now, curious murmurs circulated the room like wildfire.

“Portuguese!” someone in the back of the room called. Duo complied. Everyone followed the example.

“Russian!”

“Italian!”

“Vietnamese!”

“Swahili!”

Only on the last request did Duo stutter, glaring evilly in the direction of the speaker and throwing the bird before changing over to Swahili. Zechs gaped.

“How many languages does he speak?” he asked no one in particular, his voice slightly higher than normal in his shock.

“We’re up to eleven,” Wufei said to his right, making both Zechs and Noin jump.

“Did you know he could do that?” Zechs asked accusingly. Wufei shook his head.

“No, but it would explain so much,” the Chinese pilot mused. “I always wondered why he was smirking so much after hearing some of our transmissions.”

“In retrospect, we should have at least known that he spoke German,” Noin said, amused.

“How so?” Wufei asked at the same instant Zechs muttered, “Zwitter.” Wufei arched a brow in question.

“He hacked into Oz security,” Noin explained as Duo started a new song, this one in French. “He changed the personal information on Zechs so that his gender read as ‘zwitter’ permanently.”

“Zwitter?” Wufei repeated.

“It’s German,” Zechs sighed. Noin elaborated when he refused to explain.

“It means ‘hermaphrodite.’ He set it up as a virus so it would keep changing back whenever we tried to fix it. Took us almost a month to correct what he had done.”

“A week after he originally did it, he sent Noin a condolence gift that explained that I wasn’t good enough for her through actions alone,” Zechs muttered.

Wufei arched one eyebrow but didn’t dare ask them to elaborate. Since they were both blushing slightly, he assumed it was something fairly imaginative and extremely perverted.

“So why is it such a big deal that Duo knows twelve languages?” Wufei asked as he tallied up the list. The American switched from French to Japanese and he sighed. “Thirteen.”

“We’ve been looking for a translator,” Zechs explained, shaking his head wearily. “I never even considered asking him how many languages he spoke.”

“Our current best only knows five,” Noin sighed. “Two of those only brokenly.”

“It wastes a lot of time for them to translate amongst themselves and they usually lose a lot in the process,” Zechs said.

“Is that Laotian?” Noin interrupted incredulously, snapping her eyes back to the stage.

“I think so,” Quatre answered, joining the group.

“Fourteen,” Trowa intoned. They had been keeping count too. The Arabian held up one hand to forestall questions.

“Greek!” Quatre bellowed, turning to Trowa for confirmation.

“Fifteen,” the European answered a moment later.

“How many languages do you speak?” Zechs asked suspiciously. Trowa only smiled enigmatically.

“Enough,” he answered, his expression giving away nothing. Zechs sighed. A German song started up.

“When Duo comes down from there, I’m going to ask him,” Zechs said.

“Ask me what?” Duo asked, directly behind the platinum blond. The older man nearly jumped out of his skin.

“Don’t do that!” Zechs snapped. He paused, finally processing that a song was still resonating through the room in German. “Wait a minute…”

“Kurt’s back up there,” Duo answered before the blond could finish his question. “You know. The little German dude. Now what did you want to ask me?”

Zechs tried to glare at the braided man, but found that he couldn’t. Now that he was over his shock, he had to admit that it was rather amusing. Noin was straining to refrain from snickering and couldn’t answer the American.

“They want you to work as a translator for the Preventers,” Quatre supplied.

Duo paused, unsure. He had been sure that he would be useless to the organization after losing his eyesight. Being presented with the sudden opportunity to return to work left him a little stunned.

“Okay,” Duo said, his voice a little shaky.

“You have to translate correctly if you take the job,” Wufei said dryly.

“What makes you think I wouldn’t?” Duo asked, still a little disoriented.

“Maxwell, I know what you wrote in that essay you submitted with your application to join Oz as your proof that you spoke Spanish,” Wufei said drolly, more to cheer Duo up than anything.

“There was nothing wrong with that essay,” Duo said in his defense.

“I was the one that eventually figured it out, you know,” Noin said, eyes crinkling a bit with amusement. “You’re lucky that no one figured out what you were up to while you were still there.”

“What did it say?” Zechs sighed.

“It wasn’t so much what it said as what it did,” Noin said. “Hidden in the subtext of the electronic submission were at least four computer viruses.”

“Six,” Duo corrected. Noin rolled her eyes.

“Wait a minute,” Zechs muttered. “Was that the week when the sprinkler systems would go off somewhere in the building every time someone on base flushed a toilet?”

“That was you?” Quatre demanded, mock glaring at Duo, not really upset. Despite the collateral damage, it had been rather funny, the Maguanacs going positively berserk trying to figure out what was going on. Wufei snorted.

“Who else would it have been?” the Chinese pilot asked. Seeing the confused expressions on Zechs’s and Noin’s faces, he explained. “Duo did the same thing to one of Quatre’s mansions.”

Zechs couldn’t help but chuckle. “You know, Treize nearly went insane trying to reset the systems. I noticed that his quarters were hit at least a quarter of the time, as were mine if I remember correctly,” he said.

Noticing that the music had died out again, Wufei glanced around. “It would seem that the party is pretty much over. Not many people left. We should probably get going.”

After that, they unanimously broke up and started for their vehicles. Winking one eye in Wufei’s direction, Duo trotted after Quatre and Trowa, easily following the sound of their footsteps. Sighing in defeat, Wufei followed his companion as he caught up with the other two Gundam pilots beside the blonde’s Jaguar.

“What is it, Duo?” Quatre asked.

“We forgot to do something,” the American said.

“What would that be?” Trowa prodded.

“We all have to celebrate my new job!” Duo said triumphantly.

“And how do you propose to do that?” Wufei asked, a little suspicious at just how bouncy and amused the braided man was suddenly acting.

“Well, there is a camera in Zechs’s office,” Duo answered slyly.

Wufei gaped. Quatre and Trowa exchanged startled looks before glancing at the Chinese and American pilots. Trowa startled them all by snorting first in mild amusement, drawing his blond companion into his mind frame with a shameless look in his emerald eyes. Wufei was the last to give in, nodding his head minimally. The four pilots disappeared back into the building.

The following day, Zechs nearly suffered a heart attack. When he recovered, and eventually wrestled the security tape away from Noin, who was intent on keeping it for her own personal collection, he removed the camera from his office for good.

OWARI