Isn't life just a kick in the crotch

Chapter 7.5

This chapter takes place from where David left Wufei's apartment to confront Duo.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

Wufei hadn't moved from his spot on the couch since David had left.

The apartment was very quiet. Too quiet.

It was getting dark outside, and shadows played on the wall as cars passed by outside the window.

His glass was empty, but he didn't dare fill it up again.

Alcohol was not going to solve his problems.

His hands were cold, and no matter what he did, they stayed cold.

The phone was ringing again but he couldn’t bring himself to answer.

He just waited until it stopped.

He should get up and go to bed.

He rearranged his legs up against the back of the couch and closed his eyes.

Maybe he could sleep out here instead. Then he wouldn’t have to get up.

The phone started ringing once again.

Wufei sighed and leaned forword to look at the display. ‘David’ was flashing in time with the signal.

He really should answer.

David was probably worrying himself sick... and in that case it wouldn’t take long before the man ended up outside his door.

Wufei groaned and reached for the phone.

“Hello,” he said with a tired voice.

“Shit, man, I’ve been calling you for hours.”

“I know.”

There was a moment of silence on the other side of the line. “... Right. Listen, Wufei. I know it’s not my business, but someone has to give you two a kick in the right direction. I talked to Duo about why he broke up with you.”

“You did what?!” Wufei threw himself up onto his feet and tightened his fist. It really was a good thing for David that he had decided to call insted of going over there, or he would have found out first hand just how hard his friend could hit.

“Chill, man. Let me explain. I talked to him and I think our braided buddy is full of shit. He didn’t end it because he wanted you two to stay friends. He’s fucking terrified of fucking up. This is -Duo- that we are talking about. What the fuck does the player know about relationships? He’s scared to death that he is going to lose you when your relationship ends up like the rest of his old ones. But listen to this, when I asked him what he would say if -you- told him that you wanted to try again, he said that he would agree.”

“I-“ Wufei’s mind was spinning. “I have to think about it. Thanks, David.” He hung up before his friend had a chance to answer. The phone fell to the floor as he dropped to his knees.

Could it be that simple? To just ask for another chance? Yes, that part might be easy, but the rest was probably going to be even harder than before. Could they really make it work? They were close, yes. But were they close enough to make a romantic relationship work between them?

Was it worth it?

-:-:-:-:-:-:-

The next morning found a tired Chang Wufei on his knees in his parents’ attic. He was working his way through box after box of old toys, school papers and sketchbooks. He sorted them in piles of 'fun to keep', 'I'll look through this later' and 'why the fuck did I save this shit?'

His father had called the apartment at five thirty in the morning and told him to get his ass over there, because they where going to clean out the garage. Which meant that someone had to clean out the attic to make room for all the things in the garage. Welcome to the Chang family, where if you wanted to move something, you would have to move something else to make room for it. His father had been most upset to hear that his only son was still in bed when the sun had been up for hours. Wufei hadn't even tried to explain to him that most people (normal people) did not get up at the crack of dawn without a very good reason, and cleaning the attic was not a good reason to get up at five thirty, especially not when he had gotten to bed just two hours before his father called. But who could blame him, after David's 'talk'?

But always the loyal idiot, he soon found himself covered in dust and spider web.

'What is all this? Why did I save this? An essay about ants that I got a C- for. It's all junk,' he thought as he threw the papers in the ‘why the fuck’ pile. Grabbing yet another thick folder from the open box, he opened it, expecting more report cards or old essays. Instead he found himself looking at Duo. Or he was pretty sure that it was supposed to be his friend some time in his early teens. You could see that there had been a lot of work put into making it. But that didn't mean it was all that good. The angles were off, and the jaw was too small for the rest of the head. But you could still see that it was him. A quick check confirmed that the rest of the folder also contained sketches. 'This is strange. Why did I put these drawings in a folder amongst the school papers, and not with the rest of the drawings?' Taking the bundle of papers out, he started to look through them. He didn't get far before he found that they all had something in common. They were all of Duo. Picture after picture of everything from Duo's hands to his ears. Duo smiling, Duo laughing, Duo talking while his hands where in the air, gesticulating whatever it was he was talking about. Duo sitting, standing, running and in the back, hidden in a thin black paper file, was one of Duo... in the nude.

He almost dropped the papers in shock. Taking it out of the folder he stared at the drawing. For a second, he couldn't for the life of him figure out when he had drawn it. But then the memory came forth, and as it flashed before his eyes he couldn't believe that he could have forgotten about it.

They had visited Duo's uncle Howard one summer. The old man owned a scrap yard, and they had spent most of their time playing around among old cars and metal junk. But Howard did not only work at the scrap yard, he lived there too. He had a small trailer that was hardly big enough to fit him, never mind him and two teenage boys. So he had borrowed a small cabin in the woods from a friend of his that the two of them got to stay in. It had been a small thing, just one room with two beds and a kitchenette. But to them it had been heaven. They had so much fun there. No parents, no siblings, no school, no problems.

But the picture. The picture had been made on a rainy night a couple of days before they where going to go back home. The two of them had found something in the scrap yard... something, he couldn't remember what. But it had held their attention hard enought that they had been taken by surprise when the rain had started to fall. He remembered running like mad back to the cabin in the dark with the rain pouring down on them. They had been soaking wet when they finally had gotten there, but while he had taken the time to hang his clothes up and find dry ones to put on, Duo had simply thrown everything off in a pile on the floor before getting his long hair unbound and crawling in under the cover. He had been asleep in seconds. But Wufei had not gone to bed then. Instead he had stayed up and worked on a drawing.

Some time later Duo had started kicking in his sleep, and the cover had slipped down from his naked back. The sight had fascinated him. Duo's hair had been falling in waves over his back and ass where he had been lying, facing away from Wufei. So he had started to draw, trying to get the shadows right and the shape of his back.

But the picture that was now lying in his hands was not one of a naked back covered in long hair. No, the picture was of Duo, lying on his back in all his naked glory. With every part of him carefully drawn in every detail. Wufei could clearly remember how Duo had turned over in his sleep and how he at the sight had discarded the old drawing to make this one.

But that was not what made his breath catch in his throat. No, it was the memory of what had happened after he had finished the drawing.

He had gotten up to pull the covers over him. He swore that was all he had planned to do, but his fingertips had accidentally brushed against the soft skin of Duo's stomach when he had reached for the cover. Before he could stop and think about what he was doing, he had let his fingers explore. Softly he had touched his friend’s body... up... and down. Wufei swallowed at the memory of his fingers moving downwards. Looking back he couldn't believe he had had the guts to do it. But he had. He remembered breathing too fast and being scared out of his mind that Duo was going to wake up. He had carefully let his fingers touch the limp cock in front of him. He had known that Duo was circumcised, hell; he had even seen it before. But not like that. It had felt hot and silky under his fingers. Slowly, oh so slowly, he had stroked it and the light hair around it. He had moved on, letting his fingers trail down his friend’s naked thigh and back up again. Up over his stomach and chest. Circling a pink nipple. Then he had bent down and carefully kissed his sleeping friends lips. But that’s where it had ended. Duo hadn't woken up, but he had moaned deep in his throat and his eyelids had fluttered. That had been enough to make Wufei panic and get as far away as could in the small cabin. As he crawled into his own bed that night, he fought to forget everything that had happened. Swallowing thickly, Wufei put the drawings back in the folder and pressed it against his chest.

Last night he had asked himself over and over again if it would be worth it to try again. Their earlier tries had been pretty casual. They had been dating... but the dates were pretty much the same sort of thing that they had been doing while they were just friends.

Wufei suddenly realised something, as David’s words from last night came back to him.’What the fuck does the player know about relationships?’

In their earlier tries he had followed Duo’s lead, hoping that he knew what he was doing because he did not trust his own commitment. He had put all the responsibility on the other man, letting himself be guided through the unknown territory that was gay dating. Only this was as new to Duo as it was to him. The blind leading the blind. All because he had been too insecure to really take a part in it all, and to go with his own instincts. But if this... repressed memory, or whatever you want to call it, proved anything, it was that he himself had something within him, and had probably had it for a long time, some part of him that had been interested in Duo.

The thought was mind boggling, but it made sense.

He had thought a lot about why he had talked Duo in to dating him, but most of the reasons had been in the line of wanting to make Duo happy and wanting to be closer to Duo.

But this opened up to so many more possibilities. That he could want this, -really- want this for himself. That the relationship would give him something that he might have wanted all along.

Touching Duo, being touched by Duo.

He would admit that Duo was... pretty good looking. He just had this way of making you aware of him. The way he smiled that made you smile along with him, and the way he laughed. The way he hugged him, like you were the most precious thing in the world.

What would it be like to touch Duo? To really touch him?

Ho wondered if his skin was still as soft as it had been in the cabin.

He wondered if Duo was a good kisser.

He wondered how it would feel to kiss Duo with that tongue piercing.

He reached for his cellphone.

‘If we try again, we are doing this my way,’ he thought, as he listened to the signal.

-:-:-:-:-:-:-:-

AN/

I would like to take a second to explain my thought about this chapter.

As you can see, (if you have read the FFnet version) this makes Wufei is a bit more driven in this version. This changes the way he approces Duo and their relationship.

To make things clear. The bad touching in the cabin did not happen to the Wufei in the FFnet version.

About the represt memory
I have been told by friends and old classmates who had type of thing happening to them (repressing memories that later came out when they were reminded). It was everything from car accidents to walking in on their parents having sex. So I belive that you could repress molesting your best friend while he was sleeping.

Many thanks to Reikoyazumi who is my fantastic beta reader.

-:-:-:-:-:-