Cages

Wufei 140
The morning began strange and grew steadily stranger. Of course, the first strangeness for me was to wake up alone in Zechs’ big bed. For a second, I had no idea where I was, for I had never awoke in that room before without having some part of Zechs pressed against some part of me. It took a second to reorient myself and figure out exactly why I was in bed alone. When I did remember that Zechs had taken Quatre away for the weekend, I gained melancholy realization that I had at least one more night of cold sheets and too much room to stretch to look forward to. There was even a small, distasteful pang of jealousy. Not that I begrudged Quatre any of Zechs’ time. I was merely feeling the loss of my own time with Zechs, and I couldn’t help the bad feelings that came with that. He was, after all, the first man I would truly call my lover.
I managed to put aside my own bad mood as I dressed. I had even found a small up-side to Zechs being gone, as I got to take a much longer shower without having to split the time with him. Zechs always took forever to wash his hair, and while I could see the aesthetic merit of all that hair, I simply couldn’t get my head around how much of a nuisance it had to be. As with Duo’s braid, I just couldn’t understand why one man would want to put so much effort into something as useless as hair.
Speaking of Duo, his absence from the breakfast table that morning only added to the strangeness of the day, as we were all aware of Heero’s morning routine, which was a little anal even by my standards. Still, I somewhat enjoyed the peace and quiet. That is, of course, until the calm was shattered by a shriek from Duo that could bee heard all the way downstairs in the kitchen. Heero didn’t even have time to get out of his seat before we heard the pounding of feet that signaled Duo’s dash down the stairs. By the time he reached the kitchen he had gained the full attention of everyone in the room, including Trowa, who was supposed to be watching the pancakes.
I assumed, by the volume and desperation of his yell, that he was being chased by at least thirty armed men. I expected, at least, that he would be bleeding from some orifice of his body when he finally reached the safety of the kitchen. These were the only explanations I could fathom for someone to rouse from a dead sleep, especially duo’s corpse-like slumber, and scream that way.
Imagine my surprise, then, when Duo appeared in the doorway, not only unharmed and alone, but with the audacity to wonder why we were staring at him so oddly. He even seemed upset, angry even, that we had noticed his behavior.
It was beyond my capacity to understand, so I let Heero follow Duo as he stormed out of the room. Heero speaks Duo-ese a little more fluently than the rest of us, though only the Gods know why or how he has managed to get inside Duo’s head. I’m sure it’s a frightening place, for more than one reason.
With Heero and Duo gone, quiet descended on the room once again, and I went back to sipping my tea, silently keeping Trowa company as he cooked. After a few minutes, Trowa joined me at the table, setting a large stack of pancakes in the center of the table. He nodded to me as he sipped his own glass of Chinese tea. Heero had been drinking strong, black coffee before Duo interrupted, and I doubted that Duo would have a taste for the somewhat bitter Chinese herbal tea that I enjoyed, but Trowa seemed to have a taste for it, and I offered him some whenever I brewed a pot, although he only rarely indulged.
Trowa and I seemed to have formed a quiet, tenuous friendship. It was a strange thing, I mused, as my teaching was both our strongest commonality and our largest barrier. On the one hand, Trowa and I had become closer through my patient instruction and his diligent studies. We had found commonality in the enjoyment of literature and learning. On the other hand, it was difficult for Trowa to get around the teacher-student wall that had been set up, and I often found myself falling into a lecturing tone even when we were speaking as friends. Still, I was closer to Trowa than I was to any of the others.
This is why, most likely, it was so easy for me to see through his blank mask and pick up on his worry. I could easily guess the root of that concern, as everyone was aware of how close Quatre and Trowa were. Despite being uncomfortable with the familiar gesture, I reached out and grasped Trowa’s had as he cupped his mug of tea. Startled, Trowa met my eyes, and I could see the pain, worry, confusion, and fear all tangled together inside his mind, where he would let no one enter and put the fears to rest, nor let any of the fears out, where they might dissipate in the assurances of Zechs’ competency. Instead, they would remain inside, festering like wounds, until someone lanced them and freed Trowa of their poison.
I opened my mouth, prepared to cut to the heart of the matter if need, when a loud crash from upstairs interrupted my thoughts. I heard the pounding of feet on the stairs and had the strangest feeling of deja vou, when suddenly Heero, and not Duo, came crashing through the kitchen and stormed like a could of thunder out the back door. In another moment, Duo came staggering into the kitchen, cursing and holding a bloody nose.
Trowa and I rose instantly, my previous intent completely forgotten, and rushed to Duo’s side. Prying his fingers from his face we quickly found that he had a black eye and a bloody nose, but nothing seemed broken or severely damaged. As I led Duo to a chair and Trowa ran to fetch a towel, I couldn’t help but ask, “What in the world happened?”
“Nothing,” Duo replied sullenly, staring decidedly at the ceiling as he held his head back to stop the flow of blood.
“Obviously something happened,” I responded, “You didn’t get that from one of your video games, after all.”
“I got what I damn well deserved,” Duo growled, leveling a glare at me that could probably peel paint off of walls. “Now piss off, Wufei.”
I bit my tongue on a scathing retort of my own, as a verbal battle was probably not the best idea right now, and stepped back, giving Trowa room to step in with a towel and an icepack.
“Thanks, Trowa,” Duo mumbled, wiping the blood from his face. “I’ve got to get this cleaned up before Zechs sees it.”
“Well, you’ve got a pretty fair chance of managing it,” I said before I could stop myself.
“What?”
“Master will not be here this weekend,” Trowa interjected for me. “He went no a retreat and will not be back until Sunday night.”
“Perfect timing,” Duo said, and I couldn’t quite tell if he was being sarcastic or not. “So where’s Quatre? I don’t want him to get freaked out by all this blood.”
“Quatre went with Master for the weekend,” Trowa said. I tensed, preparing for an barrage of curses from Duo, but none were forthcoming. Instead, he merely closed his eyes and murmured, “Fucking hell,” before standing and walking into the other room. Trowa and I glanced at each other, but neither of us seemed inclined to go after Duo right now, so we quietly sat down to eat.
The strangeness didn’t stop there, as much as I’d like to say it did. Once breakfast was over, I went to spend a little time in the workout room, only to find Duo already there and pumping weights like a man possessed. From his angry eyes to the dried flakes of blood on his face, Duo spoke of a man trying to rid himself of his worries via sweat, and I doubted it would be good for my health to interrupt him. It was strangely... normal, to have Duo there in the gym with me, as Heero almost always spent a little time working out on the weekend, and while he never had as much gusto as Duo was showing, he certainly had the same level of dedication. There was a dark cloud hanging around Duo, though, and as much as it didn’t bother me to have him there I still couldn’t put up with the shadow of gloom following him, infecting the whole room, and throwing of my rhythm as I tried to work out. After half the time I usually spent on my morning exercises, I quietly got up and left the room. I would talk to Duo later, after his sour mood had become a bit more mild.
I left the gym wholly unsatisfied with my workout. I had barely broken a sweat, and I certainly hadn’t touched my endurance level as I had hoped to. But I decided not to worry. After all, how long could Duo possibly hold that pace of exercise? Instead, I opted to wait him out by picking up a book of poetry and curling up in my favorite chair in the den.
Unfortunately, by the time I got my book and made it downstairs, I could already hear the sounds of a violent video game coming from the den. I sighed in annoyance. For Duo to have made it down here before me he would have had to leave the gym almost at the same time as me.
But... I could hear the sound of weight crashing against each other coming from the gym. So how?
I rounded the corner quickly, baffled by the two paradoxical sounds. For a moment, I wondered if Duo had somehow cloned himself, a terrifying thought, when I was startled to find Trowa, not a Duo, engrossed in a violent, bloody video game.
“Trowa?” I wondered, not sure whether to believe my eyes, ears, or intuition. “What are you doing?”
“Playing,” he responded simply.
“Why?” I wondered. Trowa had never shown an interest in games before, and as far as I knew he actually disliked Duo’s video games. Instead of immediately answering, though, Trowa paused, allowing his character to be brutally tossed to the ground where another, larger character proceeded to stomp on him, popping him like a bloody water balloon.
“It... keeps me from thinking,” he said softly, then restarted his game, his character magically reappearing, unpopped, on the screen.
“Oh,” I replied dumbly. “Do you want to talk about it?”
“No,” he replied sharply, his character slicing the head off of the one that had previously destroyed him. “No talking. No thinking. Just playing.”
“Oh,” I mumbled quietly, backing out of the room. “Alright then,” I said, and left.
From there, I decided it would best if I fled the entire house. To be honest, I was so thoroughly unnerved that I didn’t think I could spend another minute inside without losing my mind. Nothing was going as it should. Could it be me? Was I so thrown off by a bad night’s sleep that I was seeing everything through a distorted lense? But that couldn’t be the case; I had more control than that and, besides, something was certainly wrong with the way everyone was acting.
I knew I had to clear my head, and since it was impossible for me to find my center in the house I opted to head outside to train. There was a conveniently placed post in the yard by the barn, which I had wrapped in rope and used as a dummy for some of my more strenuous martial arts moves. Since my workout this morning had been interrupted, I thought it might be a good way to clear my head practice my kicks and jumping moves. Unfortunately, the gods were angry at me, and I arrived at my training spot only to find Heero already hard at work, using my moves on my beam.
It was a surreal moment I had just then: Trowa was acting like Duo, Duo was acting like Heero, and Heero was acting like me. Did that make me Trowa? A realized, with shockingly sudden clarity, that I had wandered around all morning, saying hardly a word to anyone. What the hell? Was I perhaps in some parallel universe where our personalities where all switched.
“I must be dreaming,” I murmured to myself as I continued to watch Heero viciously destroy my training pole. If I didn’t know better, I would have thought that he actually believed he could hit the four-by-four hard enough to break it in half with only his body. His face I could only liken to cold steel, for he wore no expression but that of determination. His body was covered in beads of sweat.
And yet, I noticed as I stood there watching him, was it merely my imagination, or were his cheeks just a bit more moist than the rest of him?
Perhaps I had fallen into some strange place, but some rules seemed to transcend even a shift in reality. Even here, it seemed, a split between Heero and Duo could not come without pain.

Heero 141
I wasn’t sure how long Wufei had been standing there before I noticed him. It spoke of how deeply I had been affected, that I didn’t even notice him watching me. Nor was he trying to hide it, which might have slightly excused my absent-mindedness, as Wufei was a champion of martial arts and could walk like a cat if he so chose. But his stance, when I finally noticed him, spoke of a deliberate invitation for attention. The set of his jaw told me that he wanted to speak with me, and I considered ignoring him, in hopes that he would go away.
But my unease was strong enough that I actually thought another opinion might be warranted, since I was uncertain that I could solve the situation on my own. On the other hand, I was also uncertain of how to solicit advise from the abnormally quiet Wufei. Luckily, he chose to open the conversation, because I wasn’t sure how to.
“Heero, is there a reason you’ve decided to remove my practice pole from the landscape?”
“Hn,” I responded, suddenly realizing just how hard I had been hitting the wooden spike. I was slightly amazed that there hadn’t been a crack; either in the wood or my leg.
There was a wooden fence along the barn that passed only a few feet away. Wufei calmly walked passed me and perched himself on the fence, while I tried to catch my breath, resting my had against the pole that I had just been abusing. Wufei gave me only a moment to rest.
“Talk to me,” he demanded, leveling a serious stare at me. “The house is a mess, I’m not completely sure I’m sane right now, and it seems that you and Duo are at the pinnacle of at least half the problem. Since Duo is beyond speaking right now, you’re going to have to explain to me how, exactly, Duo gained that bloody nose this morning.”
“I hit him,” I responded. I was usually grateful for Wufei’s straightforward manner, but today I was uncertain of how to reply to his no-nonsense questions. I wasn’t sure, myself, what the answers were.
“Ah. That explains everything,” Wufei replied distastefully, with sarcasm. “Why, pray tell, did you hit him?”
“He kissed me.”
Wufei, for once, was silent.
Well, for a moment, anyway.
“He what?”
“He kissed me.”
“Then... I suppose he deserved it,” Wufei replied. I sighed in relief. I had been worried that Wufei would think that I was in the wrong. After all, Wufei had a reputation for hating masters as much as Duo did. I had been worried he would sympathize. But, it seemed, Wufei understood. Or perhaps he only thought he understood. To be honest, I wasn’t completely sure that I understood.
It... wasn’t just the kiss. Of course, my first reaction to anyone getting that close to me would have been to hit them, but I had somewhat accustomed myself to allowing Duo close, even when his motives were uncertain or violent in nature. But... the kiss was forbidden. He knew it, I knew it, and every slave knew it. The only person who might not be aware of that rule might be Master Zechs, but I couldn’t take that chance. The punishment for kissing without permission could be as harsh as being sold, and the punishment for falling in love was death.
It was that last part that made me push Duo away. It was... It was too tempting. Too uncertain. Too close. We were too close. Dependant on one another for affection and support, how quickly could those emotions give way to love? I had never dealt with love before, so I could not calculate the probable consequences of it, but I had been told that it could drive men insane. I couldn’t afford that, not this close to Collar. Not when everything else was going so well. And, most of all, not with a Master like Zechs.
“What do you intend to do?” Wufei asked from his perch on the fence. “You can’t just leave it like this.”
“Duo needs time to settle,” I responded. “Then I will discuss this with him.”
“A wise decision, at least for the first part. I’m not sure Duo will be as rational as you’d like for the second.”
“Hn,” I replied, walking over to the fence and leaning back against it. “Regardless, I cannot allow these emotions to continue.”
“Cannot allow? You make it seem as though Duo can merely command his affection for you to vanish.”
“What else would you have me do?”
“Perhaps you should agree on a proper way to go about advancing this relationship.”
“You speak as though there is a relationship to advance.”
“Is there not?”
“No. My only concern is my relationship with Master Zechs. My affection for Duo is merely an offshoot of that goal.”
Wufei frowned, then moved to stand in front of me. He peered into my eyes, studying them, and I tried not to reveal my true emotions to his piercing eyes. I must have failed.
“If you believe what you are saying, you are a fool.”
Of course, he was right. If I looked deeper (which I was desperately trying not to, thus the previously mentioned abuse of wood) I would have to admit that it wasn’t as simple as a difference between a high risk and a low risk, or even between right and wrong. The problem was, if I took the time to analyze it properly, that I already loved Duo. I already did stupid things over him, and sacrificed my own happiness so that he could have his. All the sure signs of love- irrationality, self-sacrifice, dedication- were already there.
The problem wasn’t if I could or should love Duo... the problem was that I loved Zechs as well. Loved him first. And loved him deepest. While love with Duo was frightening and strange, love with Zechs was soothing and rational. Zechs was like a cool stream, while Duo was a smoldering fire. Zechs could sooth my mind, where Duo only caused more turmoil.
That was why I pushed Duo away. In loving Duo, accepting his love, and returning it, I would be snapping the link that I had formed with Master Zechs, however tenuous and strained that bond might be. It would be a betrayal of the worst kind, and I wasn’t willing to betray Zechs for anyone, not even for Duo.
The only response I could give was to lower my eyes, but it seemed to be enough for Wufei, for he sniffed decidedly and returned to his place at the fence. My mind, however, was not so easliy put at ease. How could I reject Duo if I had feelings for him? How could I keep him if I loved Master Zechs?
“It makes no difference what I feel,” I said suddenly, convicted that it was the only possible solution. “I will reject Duo’s advances.”
Beside me, I heard Wufei sigh. “I can tell that nothing I say will change your mind. However, I warn you, be cautious in your dealings with Duo. He feels everything very strongly, and gives himself over with a passion that borders on obsession.”
“Do you think he will refuse to compete in Collar if I refuse his advances?”
“I think your rejection could hinder his progress, yes, but I’m more worried about his mental state. Collar comes around every year, but we only have one chance with Duo. I don’t want you to break his spirit.”
“Should I allow this to continue.”
“No. If you feel the need to break it off, you must do it now. Duo’s affection is still in its infancy and had yet to take a solid root. The longer you give it, the deeper these attachments will go.”
“So I should tell him that these emotions are inappropriate and he must discontinue them.”
“I did not say that. Personally, I believe that you should explore this relationship. It is not healthy for you to think only of Zechs in everything you do. You should be able to grow as yourself as well.”
I stared at him for a moment, trying to puzzle out what he could mean by that. When I finally managed to understand, I couldn’t help but smile at his ingenuity.”
“I understand now,” I told him, although he seemed confused by my smile. Perhaps he assumed I would not be able to interpret his motivation. “You wish to be Master’s favorite.”
Wufei face did a perplexing dance then, from surprise, to confusion, to a dawning horror. When it was finished, he looked at me in a stunned kind of shock.
“I wouldn’t! I don’t!” he stuttered, but there was an underlying question that I didn’t have the answer to, so I stood and started back to the house.
“You and I are not so different, Wufei,” I told him as I walked, never looking back. “We both want a place in the same man’s esteem,” I told him. It was a moment before he answered, and even then it was so soft that I would have missed it had the wind not carried it to me.
“No, we are not the same, for I seek a place in his heart.”

Trowa 142
It hadn’t been a good day. Not that anything terribly bad had happened, nor did I expect anything catastrophic to occur. It just... hadn’t been as pleasant a day as I had become used to.
It may have seemed to me like a worse day than it actually was, as I couldn’t seem to shake this sense of... melancholy, which kept me from feeling any joy. Of courses, at least part of the reason for my bad mood was certainly Quatre’s absence and my resulting worry. Even though Master had taken me aside the night before and assured me that he was neither angry at Quatre, going to sell Quatre, or going to hurt Quatre, I still couldn’t seem to stop worrying about him.
Not that I thought Master was actually going to hurt him. I had known Master Zechs for long enough now that I would easily trust him with any of our lives, having full confidence that he would not allow harm or abuse to come to any of them. And yet, having lived so long with masters who would buy and sell in a heartbeat, having my name and style changed almost weekly, and losing or gaining friend and enemy slaves every day, I couldn’t help but feel that nagging sense that I would never see Quatre again. I didn’t believe it, but I couldn’t stop from feeling it.
Perhaps the worst compound to the problem was Master’s absence. While I was closest among my peers to Quatre, I’m not sure I could say who I was closer to at that time; Master or Quatre. While I enjoyed a friendship and equality with Quatre, I also enjoyed being dominated and taken care of by Master. Having both of them gone, it seemed like my entire support system had suddenly been pulled away from me. I knew, if I had asked, any of the others would have listened to me, and I contemplated more than once talking to Wufei about it, but it wasn’t so much verbal reassurances that I was after. With Quatre, I would probably seek to lose my cares by making music with him, or with Master I would have certainly sought physical reassurances through either touch or sex. Unfortunately, I wasn’t comfortable asking any of the other for the same kind of affection, and, since I was pretty sure that talking about it would only cause me too worry more, I declined Wufei’s offer to talk and avoided the others.
I tried desperately to distract myself, with only mild success. Music and cooking were things Quatre and I did together, so I couldn’t find joy in either of those tasks. Master, meanwhile, would have probably allowed me to seduce him, then used the period of blissful lethargy after sex to coax the problem out of me. Neither of these outlets, then, were open to me, and I found that I just couldn’t keep my mind on any book. It was desperation, then that caused me to look to Duo’s video games as a distraction, but thankfully they proved to be just what I needed to calm my tumultuous mind. As Duo had no interest in them that day, I was allowed to distract myself for long periods of time without interruption.
Of course, I was well aware of the fight between Duo and Heero. With only four people in the house it was impossible not to realize that something was amiss between the close pair, and certainly the blood on Duo’s face that morning would have clued me in if nothing else had. I felt vaguely guilty for
not attempting to mediate the fight, but I just didn’t think I could handle their problems on top of my own. Duo and Heero had both often struck me as somewhat high maintenance, and I just couldn’t find the type of energy it would have taken to talk to the two. Without Master around to keep them in line, I wasn’t sure they’d listen to me anyway.
The house was quiet all that day, as though a kind of oppressive air was bogging down the sounds and preventing them from being heard. By nightfall, a crypt couldn’t have sounded any more silent than the house. At dinner, the clinking of glasses and silverware rang like church bells after a funeral. At least, that how it sounded to me, though I will be the first to admit that I was probably in a pretty sour mood that day. Worry about Quatre was eating at me from the inside, and the constant silence only allowed me more time to concentrate on the pain. Morbidly, I couldn’t help but wonder if the house would remain like this, if Master returned without Quatre. Was it Quatre’s absence that created such a foul mood? Or Master’s? It was hard to say which I missed more, and it was only my worry for Quatre that caused me to think more of him. My longing for Master was compounded by this situation, because I both missed and needed him fiercely without Quatre around. With the both of them gone, my support system was almost completely destroyed, and it made me acutely aware of just how dependent I really was.
I’m sure I make it sound like I didn’t trust Master to take care of Quatre while they were gone. Honestly, that wasn’t at all the way I thought. The simple truth is that Quatre was the only one I could contemplate not coming back. Were Quatre to not return, I could see the house becoming depressed, despondent even, but current existence would continue. It would not have the level of happiness we had come to expect from living with Master, but certainly we would continue to live as a unit, trying to overcome the tragic loss of our little angel.
Without Master, though, there would be no continued existence. The group would be splintered, each sold to a new Master or, in Wufei’s case, returned to the old. It was unlikely that any of us would be permitted to stay together, and assuming that some were allowed the level of freedom and closeness we had experienced would probably completely vanish. Outside Master’s protective embrace, we would become enemies and hollow shells of the people Master had tried to create. Death would seem welcoming by comparison. With the hope of seeing Master again in it, I could not guarantee that we would avoid, consciously or subconsciously, seeking it. After tasting paradise with master, we would all be eager to return.
Beyond that, the group was falling apart around us with Master gone. It was a bad thing, I knew, for us to be this dependent on Master, for we would not always be able to stay with him. However, I could also see that some of the stress was caused by the newness of the relationship. I could tell that the others, as I was, were suffering from the faint but terrifying doubt that Master would return. It, along with the stresses of teen life, our compounding mental traumas, and Master’s first true absence, was proving too much for our little family. Wufei was doing his best to bring us together, but it was in his nature to be slightly aloof and removed from others. From the way he held himself and interact with the others I could tell that he had a hard time getting close to others, and an even harder time opening up to them. Wufei was much more comfortable with his books or subjects like philosophy and strategy. And it wasn’t all Wufei’s fault. It seemed that the others, as well, were having a hard time talking to him. Wufei was, after all, almost the last to be added to the group, and the only member still holding ties to another Master. As much as Wufei had done to gain the groups trust, there was still some underlying mystery to his motives that, perhaps subconsciously, the others found keeping them form opening up completely to Wufei. Whatever the reason, Wufei was doing his best to hold the group together while we waited for Master to return and reunite us, but it was impossible to tell if it would be enough.
Midnight found me lying in bed, staring at the ceiling. Most of us had retired some time after ten, which probably spoke of how much we all missed Master Zechs, that we would follow his usual pattern even if he was not here to tell us. It was impossible to sleep, though, even with the realization that Quatre and Master would return sooner if I did. For a while, I practiced the letters that Wufei had taught me, going over the shape of each letter in my head and trying to place it with its sound. Then I began to pair them, the c and the k, the i and the e, until I had worked through all the combination sounds they could make up to ough and augh. Then I tried to think of the way a word would look if made of letters, but a shout from Heero and Duo’s room interrupted me. I listened again, worried someone might have broken in, but when the sound came again I realized, from the tone and length, that Duo was simply having another nightmare. I stayed in bed, knowing that Heero would comfort Duo, and also that Heero was the only one who could. Duo continued to whimper and moan, but it often took him some time to come out of the dream, so I thought nothing of it. After a moment, I returned to my word game, but dozed off soon after.
The next morning, panic ensued. I knew before I even opened my eyes, though I wasn’t observant enough to guess the cause. I contemplated, for a moment, keeping my eyes closed as the quickly shuffling footsteps passed my door, but the choice was taken from my hands as my door softly opened, admitting another pair of quickly shuffling footsteps entered my room. I wondered, in the moment before I opened my eyes, why the other would bother softening their footsteps if they weren’t concerned about waking me, in which case they wouldn’t have opened my door. It struck me, as I opened my eyes to see Heero opening my closet, that something serious must be happening. Unfortunately, I couldn’t prevent the first words out of my mouth from being, “Why are you in my closet?”
He didn’t answer immediately, instead pushing aside my clothes and poking through, as if trying to unearth some treasure. It wasn’t until he pulled back and closed the closet door that he spoke to me.
“Duo’s missing.”
“Missing? Since when?”
“Late last night or early this morning, we think,” Wufei said, entering the room then turning to Heero. “No sign of him?”
“I told you he wouldn’t be in here. Why would he try to hide in the house?”
“It’s a lot better than assuming the alternative.”
We all knew what the alternative was. If Duo was not hiding somewhere in the house, then he had run away. If Master found out, the punishment would be severe. If Duo wasn’t sold, then Master was very generous indeed. If Duo wasn’t found quickly or found at all and Collar got wind of it, it would mean severe fines for Master, humiliation, and the possibility of having all his slave taken away. The rest of us... well, at the very least we would have to deal with an angry master, and the worst was too much to think about.
“Wait,” I stopped them, sitting up and pushing down the covers. Outside, I noticed, it was raining in a fierce downpour. “How... did Duo get out?”
“He must have snuck out while I was sleeping,” Heero replied, his stare slightly fiercer than usual.
“But... he had a nightmare. I heard it. How could he sneak out of your bed?” I wondered. The glare softened minutely, and his eyes flicked to the side. I didn’t need his next words to understand what had happened.
“We were not in the same bed.”
“Heero!” Wufei gasped, shocked.
“It was only one night!” Heero growled defensively. “I didn’t... I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea. I never thought he’d run off because of it!”
“Duo has always been unstable,” I told them, trying to bring some sanity back into a situation that was rapidly deteriorating into a fight. “This may have pushed him over the edge, but we always knew there was a possibility he would bolt. The question is, what do we do now?”
“We have to find him and get him back here before Master returns!” Heero responded emphatically.
“No. This is too big for us to handle on our own. We need to call Zechs now, before Duo gets any further.”
“Master will get rid of him the instant he finds out Duo bolted! You’re condemning him to a fate worse than death!”
“You don’t know that. And, besides, what if we don’t find Duo? Did you think about that? Zechs will be ruined, we’ll be sold, and Duo will either be found and killed or die somewhere in the wilderness.”
“Look at the rain, Wufei! He couldn’t have gotten far! We could have him back here before Master even...”
“This is ridiculous! You can’t just...”
“I won’t....”
“Listen here...”
“Enough!” I demanded, my level tone carrying well over their bickering. They quieted instantly, and I fought the urge to rub my temples. I wasn’t even out of bed and already they’d given me a headache. “Wufei, what time is Master scheduled to be back?”
“Around noon, but certainly you can’t...”
“It’s unlikely Master could get back much sooner than that even if we called him. Heero, that gives you until noon to find Duo. After that, Wufei and I will bring Master up to speed if you don’t. The important thing here is that we find Duo, which will never happen if you two keep bickering.” They nodded their assent. “Good. I’ll assume you’ve searched all the buildings, so we’ll meet in the kitchen in ten minutes with any equipment that might be useful. Radios, blankets, medkits, and flashlights are going to be a necessity, but bring anything else that you think might be helpful. Let’s move.”

Zechs 143
Despite the fact that Quatre and I had both gone to sleep fairly early the night before, neither of us awoke before ten the next morning. Unfortunately, having slept so late, there was little time to do anything other than shower, eat, and pack before it was time to head home. Of course, we probably would have spent more time on the latter two had Quatre not surprised me into a quickie in the shower.
It amazed that, the morning after our first being intimate, Quatre was able to come back from all the traumatic things that had happened to him to be with me. Would it be vain to say I was somewhat proud of myself ? For he certainly bent over eagerly enough for me that morning in the shower, even though I offered him ulterior modes of release.
By noon we were sated, clean, filled, packed, and on the way home. In the car, despite previous protests that he was fine, Quatre soon drifted to sleep, slowly slipping until he lay across my lap, his head pillowed on the crook of my arm. The play of the sun through the trees as the limo hastened us through the dense forest made shadows play across his face, giving it an almost impish or elven quality. I smiled softly, entranced by his beauty and unsurprised by his sleep. These last few days had been emotionally, and somewhat physically, trying for Quatre. He had overcome a lot in a mere few days, and I was proud of the progress he had made. He deserved a little rest, especially now that we were returning. I had taken him away from the others when I decided to seduce him, not only to give him privacy, but also to escape the challenge aspects of the relationships between the slaves. Now, with the group dynamics abruptly changing again, I wondered how the others would react to this new, sexual side of Quatre.
Of course, though the next few days might create some tension, I had no doubt that the boys would overcome it. Something as slight as this would not break them apart, and perhaps it would even bring them closer. Whatever the outcome, I decided as I laid my head back against the seat, for now I would rest, just for a moment, and enjoy the quiet peace that the ride was offering.
It was the last bit of peace I would gain that day.
As we got nearer to home, we entered into a fierce downpour. Water was puddled inches deep along the side of the road, so I inferred that the rain had begun several hours early, probably sometime late at night or in the early hours of the morning. Looking back, I suppose I should have been forewarned by the omen, but it seemed that my weekend with Quatre had left my mind somewhat overly optimistic.
I had expected, perhaps somewhat vainly, that our arrival to the house would be met with warm greetings. If not for my welcome, I had expected that Trowa at least would want to welcome Quatre home. Even with the rain, I had thought they would at least be waiting at the door, though I had somewhat expected them to brave the storm to welcome us back. Saying that I was disappointed would be a little strongly worded, but I was certainly concerned.
Quatre, who had awoken a few miles away from the house, took in the scene with the same trepidation that I had, and I could see outright worry in his eyes. Quatre is far more astute than normal people about these kinds of things, and I trusted his intuition more than my own. Seeing the fear in his eyes, I was immediately up and out of the car, uncharacteristically leaving the driver to bring the luggage in. Quatre was only a step behind me, which was a testament to how in sync we had become.
I managed to keep the door from slamming against the wall as we entered, but just barely. In my haste to find the boys, I completely forgot to shut it, and would probably have left it standing open despite the rain had Quatre not closed it behind me.
“Boys?” I called, pausing to listen for their voices. The house was unnaturally silent. “Wufei? Heero? Duo? Trowa? Where are you?”
“Master?” came a voice from down the hall. It was a sopping wet and muddy Trowa who rushed to meet us, barefoot because of the mud and dirty from head to toe. In his hand was one of the small radios I kept in the basement for emergencies, and as I entered he raised it to his mouth and said something that I couldn’t make out.
“What’s happening? Where are the others?” I asked him as soon as I was close enough to be sure he was alright.
“I just called Heero and Wufei in,” he replied, his tone calm and gentle as ever, though I saw his eyes shift to Quatre, who was flagging me nervously. “We can meet them in the kitchen. Did your trip go well?” he wondered, casually changing the subject, though I could sense a hint of nervousness. Whatever was going on, I could tell Trowa didn’t want to face me alone when it was brought into the open.
“It was fine,” I replied tensely, already heading for the front of the house.
“Did you... Did you accomplish your goal?” he asked, his voice barely above a whisper.
“Of course,” Quatre replied, interceding between the two of us. The last thing I wanted to do right now was give reassurances to an uncertain and possibly jealous teen. Perhaps Quatre could sense that, because he took Trowa by the hand and pulled him away from me, slowing their pace as I hurried ahead. I could hear Quatre murmuring reassurances that everything had turned out well even as I practically ran to the kitchen to meet with the other boys. But only Heero and Wufei, both just as muddy and worn-looking as Trowa, who were there to meet me.
Duo was suspiciously absent.
“Where’s Duo?” I asked as calmly as I could manage. Their guilty faces made my heart sink and reassured me that I hadn’t been merely jumping to conclusions. “What happened?”
“It’s my fault,” Heero said, stepping forward. I listened, but dismissed his words. Heero was willing to take the blame for almost anything if it would keep the other boy out of trouble. I wondered if that sort of attachment was healthy for this stage in their relationship, but quickly pushed the thought aside. There were more important things to think about. “We had a fight, and when I got up this morning he was gone.”
“Have you checked the house?”
“Yes sir.”
“What about the basement and the attic? You know Duo can fit into the crawl spaces.”
“We check them twice.”
“You checked the barn?”
“Yes sir... Master?”
“What?”
“...Bee is gone.”
It took me a moment to realize what Heero was implying.
“Duo’s on horseback?” I growled, grinding my teeth together to keep from losing my temper. I managed it, but only because I knew that flying into a rage at the boys, as with any troops, would only cause them to lose focus and panic. I needed to seem totally collected if we were going to have any chance of pulling this off.
“We think so.”
“Why didn’t you call me?” I snapped, just barely reigning my flaring anger. If Duo was on horseback, and if he somehow managed to get around the perimeter guards on the horse, he could be gone for good. Obviously, I should have been called regardless, and there would be severe discussions of exactly what actions were called for in such a state of emergency, but trying to catch Duo on foot was a lot less serious than trying to catch him on a horse.
“We were just coming to call you,” Wufei said calmly, stepping between Heero and myself. “We only realized Bee was gone minutes ago.”
“Heero, you’ve been showing Duo how to ride. How far could he have gotten?” I asked, looking over Wufei to where Heero nearly cowered behind him.
“Not very far. He isn’t very good at riding, and he has a hard time keeping Bee from bolting when she’s startled. There’s a good chance, with all of this lightening, that he’ll waste half his time trying to catch her.”
“Alright, I want you four to wait here while I go make a phone call,” I told them sternly, then turned and stormed into my office. Viciously I forced the switch on and pounded in the number for my head guard.
If I were honest, I would have to admit that it was more than worry and wounded pride that would make me behave in such a fashion. Yes, I was worried about Duo and my assignment, and yes, I was upset that Duo had dared to run away, but even I knew that the main reason for my anger wasn’t so petty. It was betrayal that sat so poorly in my stomach, that festered in my heart even as I rushed to save the very thing that was causing me so much pain. The question haunted me, even as I impatiently waited for my guard to answer, as to wether he had merely been biding his time here and waiting for me to leave so that he could run off. Had it all been faked? His joy and his pain, could I trust any of it, now that he had shown how little it all meant to him? I had thought... well, I certainly hadn’t thought he liked me, but I had wanted to believe that he was learning to tolerate me. Was his life here really so bad, that he would run off in a typhoon to get away from it? And what of the others? Surely he must have known what pain losing him would cause to them, even without my wrath falling upon them. And Heero? Did the devotion Heero had given him mean nothing, that he would let a petty squabble come between them? If that could be trusted as well, for if he had faked every other emotion he had shown so far then surely he could fake a fight realistic enough to put Heero at odds with him. Had he just been using Heero? Had he just been using all of us?
The time for such thoughts ended abruptly as the alert, watchful face of my commanding guard appeared on screen. His hair was dark with flecks of gray scattered about, and his face was clean-shaven but wrinkled. Still, his eyes held all the wisdom of an elder and all the energy of a youth, and I trusted his skills explicitly. So I could only pray that the news he gave me would be good.
“I have a missing slave. Duo, the one with the long hair, went missing early this morning. Have you apprehended him?”
“Negative,” came his instant response, and my heart sank. “We were not aware that we should be tracking him.”
“The information was just made available to me. Has the storm interfered with your equipment?”
“Negative.”
“Has anyone crossed the property lines since last night?”
“No,” he told me firmly. “All our equipment is running smoothly, and no person has walked onto or off of this property except for you yourself. Wherever the kid is, he’s within the eighty acres that we’re watching. Do you want me to deploy troops to search for him, commander?”
“Negative. Do not leave your post. The most crucial mission for now is to keep Duo from getting off the property. Triple patrols and make sure someone is watching the live feeds and alarms at all times. We can’t let Duo get off the property.”
“Yes, sir.”
“I’ll have my radio on the standard frequency. If you find him, notify me immediately. Dismissed,” I said, then disconnected the line.
I sighed and rubbed at my temples. It was going to be a long day, I thought, but there was barely even time for the thought to cross my mind before I was heading to the kitchen to rally my slaves.
It was time to chase down Shinigami.

Wufei 144
Quatre was named base commander, probably because Master didn’t want someone with that little body-fat out in the wind and rain. His job was to watch in case Duo came back (which was highly unlikely) and keep a constant stream of hot drinks flowing. Zechs called Sally to come up, probably both in case anyone got hurt and to keep an eye on Quatre, who’s weight and health, though better, were still kept under close scurteny by Master. Regardless, Sally arrived within an hour, and immediately began harassing Quatre about his weight, even though it looked like he’d gained a few ounces while he was away. Still, Quatre seemed well at ease with Sally, which helped to put Master at ease.
The rest of us quickly resumed the hunt, with Master at the forefront this time. At first, Zechs and Heero mounted their horses to search while Trowa and I tried to track Duo from the ground. Unfortunately, the storm was so strong that it had washed away all his footprints, and it was impossible to tell which branches had been broken by him and which had been snapped by the wind. Even Trowa’s sharp tracking skills failed in the face of such a washout, and we eventually mounted behind Heero and Zechs to lend the mounted search and extra pair of eyes.
It seemed like a hopeless venture right from the start, and only grew more desperate as the hours passed. The storm picked up speed, as though the wind itself was trying to hide Duo from us. The weather turned abruptly cold, made only worse by the wind and torrential rains. I huddled close to Zechs’ back, savoring the warmth of his body after only a few days of absence, clinging tighter as the wind threatened to pull me right off the back of the horse. I was beginning to worry that we would neither find Duo nor make it out of this storm.
Zechs, though, was a rock that even the storm could not lift. Onward he trudged, guiding his horse forward through waist-deep water and bogs of my and debris. Never wavering, I was awed by his strength, and it suddenly dawned on me that I had never stood a chance in dueling a man of this caliber. I was only grateful that such a pure soul contained such great strength. I shuddered to imagine the consequences if Zechs had been like the Owner.
If Zechs was a rock in the storm, then certainly Heero was a demon. Always several lengths in front of us, it seemed that Heero could barely contain himself from leaping off his horse and searching on foot at a frantic pace that the storm and the horses would not allow. Despite this, Heero rode Zero like the hounds of hell were nipping at their heels, and Trowa was very little help as he clung desperately to horse and rider in an attempt to stay mounted.
By eight o’clock, hope of finding Duo was beginning to wain as no signs of him were forthcoming. After almost eight hours of constant searching, punctuated by only brief stops for rest and dry clothes, we were all exhausted. When the weather, already fearsome and frigid, took a sudden dip in temperature and began to rain chunks of hail down upon us, Zechs called a halt to our journey and led the horses back to the barn. Once the horses, also exhausted, were settled in the barn, the four of us trudged back to the house, where warm blankets and hot cocoa awaited us.
But one in our party was not ready to even pause. As the rest of us grabbed hot mugs supplied by Quatre and draped ourselves wearily across the kitchen chairs, Heero was already moving determinedly to the maps spread out across the kitchen table. We had placed markers at all the place we had already been, so there was a spiral of dots moving from the farthest edges of the property toward the house. Our best hope to find Duo would be to stumble over him in whatever makeshift shelter he had found for himself. If he was on the move in whether like this we had very little chance of either spotting him or chasing him down; however, the storm made it unlikely that he would be able to maintain movement, especially with the few supplies he could have taken from the house.
Heero’s first task was to set up markers for the new places we had searched. He placed the small, blue chips across the map carefully, then absently picked up the mug Quatre handed to him. I have no doubt that, had Quatre not thrust the mug of steaming liquid directly into his hands, Heero would have ignored the needs of his body completely. As it was, he only took a few sips before setting the cup aside and turning to Zechs.
“Based on our search so far, I believe that Duo must be hiding either here,” he said, gesturing to a thick grove of trees on the map, “or here,” he continued, this time waving to a stone crevice that the nearby stream had created, “we should be able to search both places within an hour on horseback...”
“The horses are exhausted. Taking them out again tonight would be a risk to their health,” Zechs countered, his tone as serious as I’d ever heard it.
“I understand. It will be much more difficult on foot, then, but if we leave now...”
“No one’s going anywhere right now, much less out into that storm. I won’t have you all going hypothermic on the off chance that Duo is close-by. You all need at least a half an hour to warm up before I let you go back out, and that’s assuming none of you managed to catch a fever from being wet and cold.”
“But...”
“Zechs is right, Heero,” Sally interjected, her voice taking on a professional edge. “You are all risking serious sickness as it is, and you could easily die out there if you don’t give your body time to recuperate. Everyone needs to get into dry clothes, warm up, and get something to eat. You’re no good to us dead.”
“We can’t just leave Duo out there!”
“We’ll find him, Heero,” Zechs said placatingly, placing a hand on the tense boy’s shoulder, “Just not until the storm breaks.”
“The could be hours!” Heero growled, pulling away from his taller master. “Duo could be dead by then! He could be dead now! He could have frozen to death out there and it would be all my... all my...” he gasped, barely holding himself above a complete breakdown. His closest friend was gone, possibly dead, and all over a stupid fight between the two of them. Looking at the raw, bleeding pain in Heero’s eyes, I felt like smacking Duo into the next decade, assuming he was found alive and well.
There were really no words that would have comforted Heero right then, and I think Zechs knew this, because he silently pulled Heero tight against his chest, offering support to the emotional teen. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Sally leave the room and could only wonder if she had been overcome by the emotion in the room or if something else had come up. Quatre and Trowa, on the other hand, were seated side by side at the kitchen’s small bar, with Trowa nurse a mug of chocolate and supporting a teary-eyed Quatre beside him. Like me, their eyes were glued to the scene playing out between Heero and Zechs at center stage. I could only wonder what would happen next as Heero’s angst quieted and his determination remained the same. In a moment, he pulled away from Zechs and rubbed his eyes.
“Please, Master” Heero begged, his voice barely above a whisper, “I can’t lose him.”
“You won’t” Zechs promised, “If there’s any way to find, I swear to you, we’ll get him back. But I won’t trade your life for his, Angel. Don’t ask me to.”
“I have to go with you,” Heero decided suddenly, frowning and attempting to pull away from Zechs. “You don’t know him like I do, you won’t know where to look. You won’tfind him without me!” he declared, clenching his fists determinedly. It was then that I caught sight of Sally reentering the room, and the item clenched in her hand made my esteem for the good doctor rise a notch or two. Zechs, also noticing Sally’s entrance, suddenly pulled Heero into another fierce hug.
Which made the boy completely helpless when Sally injected what I could only assume was a sedative into his restrained arm. A dishonorable act, perhaps, but a noble intention, as I was certain that, unrestrained, nothing could have kept Heero from braving the storm again. And, this side of consciousness, I wasn’t sure we could even keep him restrained. Heero cursed and thrashed as he felt the needle pierce his skin, but the drug took effect quickly and he slumped in Zechs’ arms after only a few seconds.
“Take him from me,” Master instructed, motioning Trowa over. Gently he handed his burden over to Trowa, who easily and carefully maneuvered the smaller body. “Take him upstairs, get him into dry clothes, and put him to bed.”
“Yes, Master.”
“Wufei, could you go help him? Then I want you both in to dry clothes as well. You won’t be doing anyone any good with pneumonia,” Zechs said. We nodded, and then moved to accomplish the task.
Heero was much easier to handle unconscious. Trowa and I managed to get him out of his wet clothes an into dry ones, an awkward if not difficult task, and tucked him in to his single bed. The frown on his face as we settled him in seemed to single his unconscious awareness of his missing bed-partner, but there was no way to currently rectify the situation. So Trowa and I left Heero to change our own clothes, then met Quatre downstairs, where he had a bowl of soup waiting for each of us.
It was several minutes later, after my own soup had been inhaled in front of the cozy fire in the den, that I realized Zechs had yet to join us. It seemed that he had taken far long enough to change his clothes, and so I asked Quatre about it.
“I’m sure I saw him go upstairs,” the blond replied, his brow furrowing in confusion. “I don’t know what could be taking him so long.”
With a mounting sense of dread, I rose and climbed the stairs to the master bedroom. The door was firmly closed, but inside I could hear no sounds of movement, so I was unsurprised when I opened the door to reveal no person inside. I stepped inside anyway, perhaps to stifle a sense of disbelief. A flash of lightening outside the window caught my eye, and I moved closer, only to have my sight drawn to a door swinging open in the barn. I was certain I had closed the barn when I came out. Which could only mean one thing.
Zechs was gone.

Zechs 145
I fought Charger as he tried, once again, to turn back to the barn, all the while cursing myself as an idiot. Perhaps the horse was far smarter than I was, for he at least had the good sense to tuck his tail between his legs and admit when the storm had outdone him. Whereas I, on the other hand, was stupidly trying to face the storm head on without even having rest or backup to help me. But that look in Heero’s eyes...
Idiot.
The storm was only growing stronger, and the weather more icy with it. Where you could just barely see your breath with a lungful of air when I had forced the boys back, now I could see a tendril of mist swirling in front of my face with even the slightest gasp or sigh. The ground, which had been almost swamp-like with mud earlier, now crackled and snapped with every step of the horse, a thin layer of ice having formed over the surface.
Moron.
It was, probably, only the plastic raincoats, worn by myself and Charger, that kept either of us from freezing to death, especially as a sudden cold snap caused the rain to begin freezing as it landed, covering any uncovered skin in a think layer of ice almost immediately. My hands, which were already a pale, sickly white, began to turn blue, and I realized suddenly that I would have to at least get under cover until the worst of the storm blew over or risk freezing to death. It didn’t take much to lead Charger to a thick covering of pine trees. As I said, Charger was far smarter than I was proving to be, and would have headed there long before if not for my constant misguidance.
Imbecile.
I dismounted and pulled Charger under the branches of a tall pine, where the branches were so think that the needles covering the ground were barely wet. We hunkered down together in a niche formed by the trunk, each willing to share heat until the worst of the storm had passed. Which would, I was fairly certain, be soon, as this was a summer storm that had come down from the high mountains nearby, bringing with it a full day of torrential rains and terrible cold, but never more than that. It was difficult for most people to imagine how a cold front like this could simply fall off the mountain and come crashing into the slight valley below it, but I had grown up in the wilderness of these regions. I would have a much better chance of finding Duo once the storm had broken, assuming it wasn’t already too late.
Dimwit.
Was it stupid of me, I wondered, to be worrying about Duo, even as I bled from the betrayal? Was it even worse that I could think of it as such? I mean, after all, I was the master and he was the slave. Shouldn’t the prisoner always attempt to flee the guard? Even when the cage was gilded? Instead of feeling hurt that he had left me, shouldn’t I feel proud that he had been this dedicated? Cocky, perhaps, but with a drive that I would have killed for on the front lines of battle. And yet, here I was, feeling as though I’d been stood up on an overly anticipated date.
Fool.
Charger whinnied and I pulled him closer, hoping to calm him. Charger wasn’t particularly fond of bolting, but even the most good-natured horse could run in a storm like this. If I were honest, I’d admit that even I had the urge to run for the safety of the house. On a night like this, it was probably more common sense than cowardice that would prompt such actions. After all, only the most fool-hardy of blockheads would go out in the peak of a mountain storm with nothing but his horse and a radio. And, of course, having been out all day already looking for my runaway only added fatigue to the list of obstacles that I would have to overcome to even have a chance at finding Duo, if he were even alive. And then there was always the assumption that he would come back willingly with me, which seemed ridiculous in itself considering that he had run away to begin with. And were he to fight me, there was no guarantee that I could overcome him in the shape I was in. What if he killed me? Slim chance that it was, what would happen to the other boys? I could only hope that Une would prevent them from being taken back to Collar, but if it posed too much of a risk to my replacement for her to pull them out, then she would most likely let them go in favor of the mission. And all for Duo, who had wanted to be gone so much that he had risked his life to be away from me. There was another whinny as I continued to berate myself, and I pulled Charger closer as emotions riled in my bitter heart.
Idio-...
Wait.
I paused a moment, listening hard, and realized suddenly that Charger hadn’t made a sound. So who…?
I lunged to my feet, pushing Charger aside and lunging deeper into the grove. That last neigh had been frantic and I called out, knowing that Bee would respond to my voice immediately in her panicked state. She called to me and I shoved through the branches, finally finding Bee tucked away under anther pine tree, similar to what Charger and I had just been under, with Duo tucked against her side.
There was blood running down his face.
It was the first thing I noticed as I approached his still, pale form. A glance at his forehead told me that the blood was superficial, coming from a small wound that had probably happened the same time he was knocked unconscious. But that was a slight worry, and even more important was the fact the he was barely shaking, even though the weather was frigid and he was wet from head to toe. Bee, laying behind him, was also just as wet, but at least neither of them were as soaked as Charger and I. The tree had sheltered them from most of the rain and, from the looks of it, had managed to save Duo’s life. Of course, I’m sure Bee had played no small part in that feat either, seeing that Duo was unconscious and probably would have died with only his own body heat to support him. And yet, I had to wonder how he had managed to get into such a predicament.
But there was no time for such stray thoughts. Duo’s life was still very much in jeopardy, and my quick movements now would decide if it remained or fled into the next life. I quickly moved over Bee, laying myself almost over top of Duo’s lifeless form as I rested my cheek against his bluish lips, praying for breath.
It was there, but just barely managed to ghost across my face. We were in dire straights. Sparing no time, I pulled off my jacket and wrapped it around Duo’s chest. It was more important to keep his upper body than his extremities. It wasn’t cold enough for frostbite to be a concern, but it was still possible for Duo’s core body temperature to drop to a dangerous or even lethal temperature.
The lack of shivering I felt as I pulled his body into my arms worried me, but it didn’t surprise me. He had been outside all day, and slowly losing heat for at least several hours. We would have to be careful about warming him up too quickly. Duo’s circulation had certainly caused the flow of blood to his heart to slow, and warming him too quickly could cause a massive surge of blood that was just as risky as hypothermia.
As a medic, all this ran through my mind even as I was scooping Duo into my arms and hoisting him onto Charger’s back. Perhaps sensing my urgency, Charger accepted his burden gracefully, without shying away or stepping to the side. Once Duo was secure, I bent to check on Bee, who was already pushing herself off the ground. A quick glance told me that she was unharmed, and I gave her a quick rub on the nose in thanks. Her loyalty had saved Duo’s life, when she could have easily abandoned him to return to her warm barn. Instead, she had chosen to protect him from the elements with her body, a noble feat of animal loyalty.
But I could only spare a moment for Bee, lest her sacrifice be in vain. I quickly mounted behind Duo on Charger, certain that Bee would follow me back to the house. It wasn’t hard to lead Charger back to the house; actually, once he realized we were headed in the direction of the warm, dry barn it was harder to keep him below a dead run. I couldn’t allow that, though, because the jostling would be bad for Duo, although I could feel the urge to bolt just as strongly as my horse. Still, I pulled out my radio and turned it on, certain that Wufei would be waiting on the other side.
Sure enough, the instant I flipped the radio to on my ears were filled with angry Mandarin curses.
“Wufei!”
“Zechs? You bastard! Are you okay?”
“I’m on my way back with Duo. Tell Sally to get ready for a hypothermia victim. Get Trowa ready to get the horses when I come in. They’ll both need to be taken care of. Did you get everything?”
“Everything will be ready when you get here. How close are you?”
“About ten minutes. Over and out.”
“Be careful,” Wufei bid, then closed his line. His parting words warmed me, reminding me that help was only a few miles away. I sighed, resting my head against Duo’s cold neck as he was pulled tight against my chest in an effort to share body heat. I was so tired, and so afraid that I had managed to fail everyone already. In that moment, with Duo pressed against me and clinging to life, with the cold rain beating against my back, and with Charger’s hooves beating against the thick mud beneath me, I allowed myself to feel, just for an instant, all the pressures that I had previously ignored. It seemed that I would be crushed by the weight of it, and for a second I wished that someone would take it all away.
But then we were nearing the house, and it was time for action again. Trowa was standing in the yard, Quatre at the barn door, and Sally and Wufei in the house doorway. I could not let them see me falter. If I crumbled, we would all crumble.

Zechs 146
As we approached the doorway, I reigned Charger in and slowed him to a walk, then jumped off his back without ever calling a full stop. Instead, I used Charger’s momentum to propel me to the door.
In shows and movies, the doctor always asks questions and runs tests straight away, but in real life there wasn’t time for any of that. Instead, Sally merely propelled me toward the downstairs bathroom, where a slightly warm shower was already running. I took the both of us in without hesitating, fully dressed and aware that I couldn’t really get any more wet.
The water felt warm against my skin, which meant that it would be almost cold to anyone else. Still, it was warm enough to start Duo shivering convulsively, and cool enough to let him adjust. But there wasn’t time to relax yet. In the next moment, Sally, who had followed us into the bathroom, was guiding me out of the shower. Another set of hands pulled Duo from my arms and I had to fight the urge to grab him back, and only seeing that Wufei was taking my burden allowed me to. Sally must have prepared Wufei well, for he instantly carried Duo into the medical room, laid him on the table, and began to undress him, with Sally stepping in to help him only a moment later. I watched them through the open doorway, not daring to step away from the bathroom wall for fear that my legs would give out.
Quatre came in as Sally and Wufei were pulling off Duo’s shirt, with my jacket already lying lifelessly on the floor. Quatre’s cheeks were red with cold, his green jacket throwing rivets of water on the floor as he quickly shucked it off and dropped it into a heap as he rushed to the bed beside Sally and Wufei.
“Is he going to be okay?” Quatre asked, his eyes wide with worry as he took in Duo’s pale skin and blue lips.
“It’s touch and go, but I think he’ll be alright if we can get him warmed up. Here, you help me get Duo out of these clothes. Wufei, get Zechs out of those wet clothes and into something dry, then bring him back downstairs so I can keep an eye on him.”
“Sally, I’m fine,” I protested as Wufei moved away from Duo toward me. Wufei snorted.
“You’d say that even if you were flat on your back and frozen to the floor. Come on, superman, let’s get you warmed up before you fall down,” he teased, putting my arms over his shoulder and guiding me up the stairs. I don’t think he realized just how worn out I was until he felt how much weight I couldn’t help but put on him. By the time we reached the top of the stairs, Wufei was nearly dragging me. If he had been any bigger, or had I been any smaller, I have no doubt he would have picked me up and carried me to the room, and I wouldn’t have had the energy to do a damn thing about it.
Once in the bedroom, I was ashamed, but not surprised, to find that my hands were shaking too hard to take off my clothes. Luckily enough, I was too tired to feel embraced as Wufei helped me undress and redressed me in loose sweat pants and a long sleeve sweater. I was glad that Wufei and I had already been intimate, otherwise I was certain I would have been mortified once I worked up the energy for it.
Dressing was pretty slow going, as Wufei was getting very little help from me, and what little help I did try to lend usually made things more difficult because of the uncontrollable shivers running through my body. All I wanted to do was pull Wufei to me, curl up in the middle of the bed, and sleep forever, but my worry for Duo would not allow that, so I didn’t protest as Wufei pulled me to my feet and helped me downstairs to the couch in the den. Once there I dropped, unceremoniously, to the couch, where Wufei wrapped me in the thickest sleeping bag in the house.
“I love you,” I whispered to him as he wrapped me tightly. Wufei chuckled.
“If you love me for a sleeping bag, what are you going to do when Quatre brings you your tea?” he teased.
“Tea? Oh, don’t toy with my emotions, cruel sprite.”
“Who’s toying with what?” Quatre asked, entering with a tray of mugs. “I just have tea.”
“Quatre, I would not be more pleased if that tray were filled with gold, diamonds, and the key to the city,” I gushed as Quatre deposited the tray on the table.
“Well that’s good, because we’re not even in a city,” he teased in response.
“Ah, right you are. Uh, Wufei? Could you do me a favor? Go check how Duo’s doing, please.”
“Of course,” Wufei said, going directly into the adjacent room to check on Duo for me. I wasn’t really concerned, because I honestly trusted Sally’s skills, it was just… I couldn’t help that nagging sense of worry. I had worked as a medic. I had scene men with close to nothing wrong with them fall over dead. I had seen situations of tranquility plunge into complete chaos for no reason. So… you must excuse me if I was just a teensy bit overprotective.
My worry was somewhat placated as Wufei departed, for I was sure that once Wufei had agreed to complete a task, not even savage grizzly bears and tornado winds would keep him from his mission. I was able to relax back against the couch cushions and close my eyes for a moment, until Quatre sat down beside me on the couch and reminded me of the awaiting tea. I opened my eyes and sat up straighter, only to find that my hands, though no longer shaking, just didn’t have the strength to grip the cup. In the aftermath of a day full of terror and strain, I was completely helpless.
Luckily, Quatre was able to sense to my predicament, or perhaps he could merely see how drained I was, for he moved to sit on my lap and, resting his head on my shoulder. From that position, Quatre managed to feed me the tea, turning it into some kind of some kind of semi-erotic bonding moment that I have no idea how he managed with me three steps to the right of dead.
We spent several moments in silence, with my focus being entirely on the tea passing my lips and warming my body. It wasn’t until the tea was gone and the warmth in my belly had permeated the rest of my body that I realized just how long it was taking Wufei to return with news of Duo.
“Wufei?” I called, pushing myself up and partially dislodging Quatre from my lap. “Wufei? What’s going on?”
“Hold your horses,” he called back, and I heard a shuffling of movement in the other room, then heavy footsteps. In another moment, Wufei entered, his arms full of blanket and one very cold teen, but I smiled as the long, wet braid falling from the mass of fabric. Quatre politely sacrificed his seat, and I tossed back the blanket and made room for Wufei to place Duo against me, then sat quietly as he wrapped the both of us in the blankets.
“He came around for a couple minutes in the other room, but he fainted again right after. Sally wants the both of you watched until your body temperatures are normal, so she suggested that we put you together.”
“That’s fine. Is she leaving soon?”
“She was packing up her things when I left.”
“Would you mind showing her out and making sure she can get her car out of the mud? Take Quatre with you, just in case she needs a push. I’d offer to help you myself but…”
“As though Sally would let you make it past the door anyway. You move off of that couch and you’ll find yourself sedated so fast your head will spin. You lay there, Quatre and I can show the good doctor out.”
“Thank you,” I sighed, letting my eyes fall closed. I was so tired, but the leftover adrenaline and emotions made sleep impossible, at least for now. Perhaps when Duo awoke I would be able to crash, but probably not before then.
As I stared at Duo, his head resting against my shoulder as his cool body lay against mine, tucked safely under the thick blankets and quickly regaining warmth, I couldn’t help but think about how far we had come, and how far we had left to go. Even without his attempted escape, Duo was far from stable, and if I were honest I would have to blame only myself for not foreseeing this attempt. Was it really that farfetched, to imagine that a notorious escape artist might once again attempt to escape? Perhaps I was the one being delusional, for thinking I could given him enough that he wouldn’t want to run from me. Was I fooling myself, to think that I could heal him? Or any of them?
But I had felt that we had been making progress. Things weren’t perfect, of course, but we had been happy, hadn’t we? Or perhaps I was the only one who had been happy. After all, these boys had been trained to make their masters happy. Perhaps I had merely allowed them to make me happy, without truly seeing how unhappy they all were in this gilded cage. Could that be it? It was the only explanation I could come up with for Duo’s escape. Even if he and Heero had been fighting, how could he be willing to give up all this if he had really been as happy as I had thought he was? And if he was so miserable that he would risk death to get away from me, how could I try to keep him here?
But I couldn’t let him go. Even if the boys weren’t as happy as I had hoped they were, their life here with me was certainly better than anything they could hope for, either in Collar or on the run. So I was stuck. I couldn’t let him go, and he wouldn’t let me close enough to fix it.
I sighed again, belatedly realizing that I had begun to stroke Duo’s hair. I combed his bangs away from his face gently, feeling an unexpected surge of tenderness towards him.
“Such problem you cause for me, little demon,” I whispered, a sigh in my voice and a half-smile on my face.
It was only then that I noticed the hint of violet peaking between almost-closed lashes, and the hot tear creeping down Duo’s cheek.

Zechs 147
“Such problems you cause for me, little demon,” I whispered, a sigh in my voice and a half-smile on my face.
It was only then that I noticed the hint of violet peaking between almost-closed lashes, and the hot tear creeping down Duo’s cheek.
“Duo? Are you alright?” I wondered, my hand immediately floating to his neck to check his pulse. I had to stifle the urge to call for Sally, knowing that they were already outside and too far away to hear me. Duo’s pulse, I found, was fine, and his temperature was good, so I could only assume that he was feeling the aftereffects of his near-death experience.
“It’s alright, little one. Shh. It’s okay,” I soothed, rubbing his back, but Duo merely shook his head and continued to cry. I pulled him closer to me and was surprised when he fell into my arms, completely without his usual fear of touch.
“Please,” he begged, and the sound tore at my heart as he pressed his face into my shoulder. “Please, don’t give up on me. I’m trying. I really am, honest. Please…” he begged, then fell into a sobbing fit.
“Shh,” I cooed, pulling him to me and wrapping my arms tightly around him. It felt as though a tight brace around my heart had finally fallen off. It was like I could breathe again. “It’s alright. I know you’re trying. I won’t give up, I promise.”
Could he have possibly known how much his words meant to me? Could he somehow have, like Quatre, sensed my mental state? But that was impossible, for Duo was certainly the least sensitive of my boys, which only made his admonition that much more sincere, and that much sweeter as well.
“I know,” he gasped between sobs, “I know I’m a pain, and that I don’t deserve any of this, and that I always screw everything up… but I’m trying! I’m trying really hard! I just…. I can’t…” he gasped before the sobs overtook him once again. I merely held him to me and road out the storm, glad for this breakthrough, but even gladder that he was alive.
“It’s alright,” I told him once he had calmed enough to hear me. “I know you’re trying. Just relax. You’re safe now, but you need to rest.”
“A-alright,” he sighed, going limp against my side. “Damn, I’m cold,” he said softly, some of his humor returning as he wiped the tears off his face. “Probably look like some kinda whore, snuggling up to you like this,” he teased nervously, but staying against me anyway. He only rested for a moment, though, before tensing up again and asking a question that I had expected to hear since he woke up. “Where’s Heero?”
“He’s upstairs, sleeping,” I replied. However, instead of getting upset, as I had expected, Duo looked dejected, lowering his eyes to look at the floor beside us.
“So he’s still mad, huh?”
“At Zechs, possibly,” Wufei commented as he entered, slightly damp but smiling. “It’s good to see you awake, Duo. Heero will be very pleased, when he comes around. Zechs had him sedated.”
“Well what did you want me to do? I couldn’t let him charge into the wilderness to freeze to death!” I defended.
“And what is that you did? I think you’ve perfectly described your actions once Heero was asleep.”
“I didn’t freeze to death,” I defended grumpily.
“Despite your best efforts,” Wufei teased as he took a seat across the room.
“Where’s Quatre?” I asked softly as I watched Duo’s eyelids begin to droop.
“He went to help Trowa with the horses.”
“Is something wrong? Is one of them hurt?”
“No, of course not. Trowa just wanted to make sure they didn’t get sick, so he hooked up a heater in the barn and decided to stay out there until the horses were totally dry and warm.”
“That’s good. You should… mmm… give him a… a raise in allowance… or something…” I slurred, feeling my eyes getting heavy. Wufei chuckled, then I heard him get up from his chair.
“Why don’t we talk about this tomorrow, when you’re coherent?” he said, tucking the blanket around myself and Duo.
“But… Heero… someone should tell him,” I protested.
“He won’t wake until tomorrow anyway. The morning is soon enough. Now get some sleep,” he said, and I was just too tired to do anything else.
I hadn’t meant to fall asleep, but once it happened I was helpless to come out of it. I have no doubt that, if left on my own, I would have slept until well after noon. Unfortunately, that fate was not to be, and I found myself awakened by movement only a few hours after sunrise.
The scene I opened my eyes to was intense, and left me feeling like something of a spectator in my own home. Heero was kneeling in front of the couch, staring at Duo as though he didn’t believe what he was seeing. Like he couldn’t fathom that Duo was still alive.
Duo, meanwhile, must have awoke a few moments before me, because his eyes were locked on Heero’s like a frightened sparrow. It looked like he would have preferred to fly out of his own skin rather than face Heero right then, but I have no doubt Heero would have pounced on him like a cat had he tried. It seemed that the emotions that had caused his sedation last night had been in no way reduced with a good night’s sleep, and Heero had awoke in the same state he had fallen asleep in.
I could almost feel eternity drifting past as the two stared at each other, their eyes locked in a battle between fear and yearning. What could be going through their minds, I wondered. Certainly Duo was trying to decide if Heero was still angry about whatever little tiff they had been in, although the rest of us were aware that Heero probably didn’t even remember the fight after all that had happened, let alone to still be angry. Heero, meanwhile, still seemed to be trying to wrap his head around Duo’s presence. The moment stretched out between them, and I felt a strangely powerful need to remain perfectly still, so as not to disturb it. It seemed, just as Duo and I had made some sort of progress last night, here too the pair was about to take a leap of faith into each other. I worried that, were I to disturb them, they would both fall into oblivion.
It was Heero who broke the moment by finally accepting that Duo was neither a ghost nor ghoul. A small, pained gasp of such intensity that I cannot described it slipped past his lips, and for a moment I could hear just a hint of the emotions roiling inside him. In the next instant, he snatched Duo from the couch and pulled him into an embrace, like the ocean pulling in the tide. Could it be that he still feared that Fate would snatch Duo away from him, even after all she had done already?
Duo, on the other hand, allowed himself to be pulled into the embrace, his body limp with shock even as his shoulders were coiled tight with tension. His eyes were wide and uncomprehending, as though he too was struggling to fathom what was happening. As Heero’s arms came around him, he let out a desperate gasp, almost identical in intensity to Heero’s earlier expulsion. His shoulders relaxed and he melted against Heero, as though that simple breath had released all the tension from his body and all the anxiety from his soul.
Duo was pulled from the couch by their embrace and toppled to the floor. If they had been thinking in a manner at all similar to coherent thy would have realized that I could not possibly have stayed asleep through that, but I had no worries that they would realize it. I contemplated, for a moment, getting up and walking out of the room, just to see if they’d notice. An almost certainty that they wouldn’t kept me in my place, along with a loathing to risk disturbing such a touching scene.
“Don’t ever leave me again,” Heero whispered frantically.
“I’m so sorry,” Duo replied just as desperately. “For everything. I never meant to make you worry.”
“I thought I’d lost you,” Heero said, his voice thick with emotion.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it,” Duo replied, resting his head against Heero’s shoulder. They were quiet for a long time then, just holding each other.
Actually, the two of them seemed perfectly happy to bask in the feeling of the other’s arms for hours, but I was beginning to get impatient. My body was making it painfully clear that I had neither eaten nor urinated in at least ten hours, and it was not pleased. Unfortunately, getting up would alert the two lovebirds that I had been spying, so I would have to wait for a convenient noise to “wake me up.”
Fortunately, someone upstairs came to my rescue, and I heard the sound of feet coming down the stairs.

Wufei 148
I may never have been more angry at anyone in my life than I was when I found that Zechs was missing. How dare he tell us to stay put, even sedate Heero to keep him from recklessly dashing into the storm to find Duo, and then do the same damn thing himself? Hypocrite! Fool! How dare he protect us, then risk his own skin without a thought?
Of course, not all of my anger stemmed from the fact that Zechs, apparently, believed that I and the rest of the slaves were weak. Mostly, and I was loathe to admit it, I was angry because I was worried. I knew the likelihood was high that Zechs would suffer the same fate as Duo, but I could not allow myself to even think of the repercussions that would have for the rest of us. But… more than that, Zechs was a good man, and a person that I could, without feeling ill, manage to call a friend, even a lover. More than worrying for our sake, I was worried for his sake.
But then, how mad could I be when he managed not only to come back, and not only to come back with Duo, but to come back with Duo still alive. Mostly frozen, I’ll grant you, but alive and intact none the less.
It was a day of high emotions, for everyone but especially for me. I was the one Heero came to when he found that Duo was missing, and I was the one to realize that Duo had taken Bee. Once Heero was sedated, I was the one that discovered, heart wrenchingly, that Zechs had gone back into the storm after Duo. And I was the one, most of all, left to wait by the radio with the faint hope that Zechs, before he stumbled into a landslide or succumbed to hypothermia, might turn his radio back on and call for help. But I was also the one that first heard Zechs’ voice, saying that they were both alive and coming back in. I was the first one Sally told that Duo would be fine, and I was the one who got to carry him into Zechs’ worried arms. Emotionally, as well as physically, it was one of my most trying days, and I hadn’t had the energy to be angry by the end, nor had I the will left.
I slept in the next morning and didn’t wake up until nearly nine. When I did finally awaken, I immediately went to check on Heero. I found, unsurprisingly, that Heero was already awake, and I was fairly certain that I knew where he was. With a half-smile, I exited the room, checked on Quatre and Trowa, both still sound asleep, and descended the stairs.
Heero, as expected, was in the living room, clinging to Duo as though he would be snatched away at any moment. As I entered, the two seemed startled to see me, as though they had been in their own little world. Zechs, it seemed, had been sleeping until I entered, but I noticed, as he looked at me and smiled in an almost relieved fashion, that his eyes were far too alert for someone who had just awakened. Still, it seemed far more likely that Zechs had been afraid of disturbing Heero and Duo’s reunion than that he was spying, so I didn’t mention it to the enthusiastic pair. I’m not sure they would have listened at the time anyway.
“Feeling better?” I asked Duo politely.
“Well I couldn’t possibly feel any worse than I did last night.”
“On the contrary,” I replied, “I’m sure you’d feel a lot worse if you were dead.”
“Or a lot better, depending on how you look at it,” Zechs interjected, then climbed to his feet and stretched. His cotton night clothes were wrinkled from sleep and his shirt slipped upward as he stretched his hands over his head, exposing a feast of well-muscled abs. It was a mouthwatering view, and I had to turn away to keep my blush from showing.
“Wufei? If you’re up anyway, would you mind ordering breakfast? I don’t think anyone will feel like cooking today,” he said, yawning and flopping back to the couch. “Just get six servings of whatever they’re having. The number is beside the phone. Thanks.”
I nodded and padded off to the kitchen, glad for the excuse to get away.
It wasn’t that I was a pervert, and it wasn’t even that I was a prude, although I was probably closer to the latter than the former. It was just that I hadn’t had sex since Zechs and I had gotten together several days ago, and, as a normal teenager, I was beginning to feel the stress. Not that we all weren’t feeling the stress. Usually, slaves were asked to be intimate fairly often with fellow slaves, both for the viewing of their master and to keep their skills sharp. Zechs, though, had instilled no such program, and except for sporadic nights with the Master, all of us had been celibate for several weeks. Not that Zechs wasn’t… masculine enough for us, for he actually had a normal or even vibrant sex life, simply that we had to split that sex life five ways, and one-fifth a normal sex life was certainly not what we were accustomed to.
But it wasn’t only that either, because I was used to having a slim to non-existent sex life, for I only ever slept with the Owner or those he ordered me to bed with, both of which were considered rare by most slaves’ standards. So perhaps, more than anything else, it was finally meeting someone that I might want to have sex with that was sparking this uncharacteristic lust within me. Or maybe puberty had finally taken its toll.
I managed to order breakfast without embarrassing myself, calling for five deluxe breakfasts, five sides of fruit, a box of donuts, a pitcher of orange juice and a pitcher of apple juice. At the end, I wasn’t sure if I had ordered too much, or too little.
Once breakfast was ordered, I remembered the medicine Sally had left last night, so I grabbed a spoon and headed to the medical room. Duo hadn’t seemed sick, of course, or Sally wouldn’t have left, but she had said a good dose of antibiotics was in order, especially after being exposed to the elements for so long. She recommended the same for Zechs, but cautioned that he might be a little stubborn about it. I was pretty sure I knew how to handle him, though.
“Duo?” I called as I entered the room. “Sally left some medicine for you to take.”
“Aw man,” Duo complained loudly. “Look, I’m fine! I don’t need any gross stuff!”
“Duo, take your medicine. I’m not going to have you getting sick because you’re stubborn,” Zechs said decisively.
“I’m glad you think that way, because Sally left a dose for you as well,” I told Zechs as I gave Duo his dose.
“What!” Zechs sputtered.
“Serves you right!” Duo crowed, once he had finished his own spoonful of the thick purple liquid.
“Sally is such a worrier, Wufei. I’m absolutely fine.”
“You know, she left suppositories of the same, just in case you decided to be stubborn,” I warned, smirking at him. Zechs glared at me, but I could tell from his eyes that he’d been defeated. Behind me, Duo laughed and I thought I heard Heero snicker, but it could have been my imagination.
I refilled the spoon and offered it to Zechs, who glared as he accepted it into his mouth. Instead of merely clearing the spoon and letting it go, though, Zechs kept a firm hold on the spoon with his mouth, staring up at me as his lips hovered only a few millimeters from my hand. It was… extremely erotic, especially when he dragged his mouth down the length of the spoon before he finally pulled his head back and swallowed. I shivered, feeling all heat in my body pool in my cheeks… and my pants. Zechs gave me a knowing smile, and I had to suppress the urge to bolt from the room.
I was saved by the doorbell, at which point I finally gave in to the urge to bolt and ran for the door. I took several bags from the familiar deliver boy, set up breakfast, and woke up Quatre and Trowa.
Breakfast was a strangely quiet, sober affair. I think duo was just too tired to create a ruckus, he seemed to be barely staying awake at the table. The rest of us, meanwhile, were waiting for some sign of Zechs’ intent toward Duo’s punishment. Would he be sold? Beaten? Would Zechs lame him? Most masters would kill a slave who tried to run, and many would injure the slave’s feet to keep them from trying to run again. I doubted that Zechs would do anything so brutal, but laming him might actually be kinder to Duo than selling him, which was a more likely option.
But… after all the effort Zechs had put into helping Duo and saving Duo, would he really waste all that effort by getting rid of Duo? Would he risk Heero’s well-being by separating him from Duo? But what else could he do? This act couldn’t go unpunished, but I couldn’t see anything that Zechs could do that wouldn’t set back everyone’s progress.
When breakfast was finished, which was signaled by the disappearance of all the food, Zechs rose and asked everyone to meet in the den. With a sense of dread we all stood and followed, except for Duo, who seemed somewhat oblivious to the agreed-upon impending doom. Regardless, Heero was tense enough for the both of them and I felt sympathy for him as we entered the room.

Heero 149
The morning after my reunion with Duo should have been joyous, but instead it was frightening and filled with dread. I couldn’t help wishing Master would just pass down his sentence, as much as I abhorred the verdict. But I didn’t think anything could be worse than the limbo I was currently facing, even if I knew life without Duo would be hell.
I couldn’t help imagining life after Duo, no matter how much I tried to stop myself. Perhaps it was a side effect of the drugs I had been given, this uncontrollable perversity of my mind. Would I hate Master, I wondered. How could I, when I so thoroughly understood his decision? Would I hate myself? It was, after all, my duty to keep Duo safe, and I had failed miserably. I had failed Master in letting him escape, failed Duo in hurting him so badly that he would need to escape, and failed myself in losing Duo, who was so precious to me.
Most of all, I feared I would come to hate Duo. And yet, how could he abandon me so easily? After everything I had done for him, he had left without a second thought. What of me? What of the rest of us, those who would be left behind to face the consequences of his actions? Did our friendship mean so little to him?
No emotion showed on my face during breakfast, and none of these thoughts were allowed past my lips, but I clung to Duo’s hand despite myself, and several times he had to remind me not to hold so tightly. Perhaps that was the only proof I needed that I would not be able to hate Duo, for even as angry as I was with him, I was barely able to release him.
At the end of breakfast, Master instructed us all to meet him in the living room. As a group, we slaves rose and walked toward the living room, each of us walking as though the floor was made of mud and our feet were being stepped down. In the hall, for just a moment, I cast a glance at the front door and contemplated shoving Duo toward it and telling him to run. I could hold the others off long enough for him to reach the barn, I was sure of it. Once and horseback, and without the rain this time, he had a good chance of making it passed the edge of the property. From there he would have to leave Bee and rush for the city, where he could hide until his pursuers gave up by dressing as a drifter and staying in the sewers.
All this flashed through my mind in the span of a step, beginning at the lift of my foot and being dismissed as ludicrous by the time I set it back down. Wasn’t that what had gotten us into this problem in the first place? How would Duo survive on his own in a strange city? What would possess me to think that Collar would ever stop looking for him? And how could I even dream of betraying Master, after all he had done for me?
Duo must have sensed my distress, because he paused in the hall and peered at my face. Looking at his trusting violet eyes, the urge to weep overcame me, and I was barely able to suppress it.
“What’s the deal, ‘Ro?” Duo wondered. I could only be amazed by his naivety. “Are you sick?”
“I’m fine,” I replied, turning away from him because it hurt too much to see him. “Let’s go. Master will be angry if we’re late.”
“Yeah,” Duo sighed, falling in to step beside me. “I guess I’ve pissed him off enough already. I’d better be on my best behavior.”
There wasn’t much to say to that, so I merely grunted and led him into the room, where everyone else was already seated. With all the slaves on the couch and Master in the armchair, it seemed almost like a courtroom, complete with judge and jury. Only the tray of tea Quatre had laid out kept the room from seeming like some kind of prison, and even then it was barely able to soften the aura of repression. By leading Duo in, it seemed like I was bailiff, and Duo the accused. It was such a strong sense that I couldn’t stifle the urge to put Duo behind me, inserting myself between Master and Duo once again.
Luckily, Master wasn’t annoyed by this protective act. Instead, he chuckled in a half amused, half annoyed way. “Sit down, Heero,” he commanded gently. I nodded once, putting aside my foolish instincts, and sat on the loveseat opposite Master, with Duo beside me.
Perhaps we were both on trial, my drug-induced sense of humor wondered perversely. I would have growled at it, but I was fairly certain such and action would make Master question my sanity and the level of stress I was under. Certainly my stress level was high enough to warrant me some erratic behavior?
Then again, Master was still acting normal, and his was certainly far higher than mine. As I watched him, waiting for a sign of what was to come, I couldn’t help but notice the faint stress lines on his forehead, nor the exhausted slump of his shoulders. There was a faint pallor to his skin that was imperceptible to all but the closest scrutiny which made him look somewhat ill. His eyes, which were always full of gentle fire, looked somehow dim and burned out. There was a weakness about him, just for an instant, that made me wonder if I was trying to defend the right person. If I were protecting Duo, who would protect Zechs?
In the next moment, though, the weakness left him, and I once again had the urge to lunge in front of Duo as Master took a deep breath and turned to the task at hand.
“I think we all know just how serious this is,” he began, his tone callous and his eyes like cold steel. “Duo, not only could your actions have hurt yourself or any of the others, your recklessness put everything we’ve worked so hard for in jeopardy. As such, your punishment will be severe, because such actions must never be repeated. Do you have anything to say that might excuse your actions?” Master asked. Duo sighed in response, then untangled his limbs from me and stood. Contrary to my expectations, he was neither nervous nor enraged. Had he given up so easily? I could only watch in confusion as he calmly, perhaps even abashedly, began to speak.
“Look, before you even say anything else, I want you to know that I’m sorry. I know what I did was stupid. I don’t know what I was thinking. Well, actually I do know what I was thinking, but it was stupid. But, anyway, I’m really sorry. I’ll never do it again, I promise,” he finished. His tone was solemn, but did he really believe that Master could just excuse everything he had done because Duo was sorry? Because he promised not to do it again? Even Master seemed confused and annoyed by this, and he frowned before regaining his composure and replying in a even tone.
“Be that as it may, Duo, there still needs to be some kind of punishment for your actions.”
“So… what? Like, should I wash your car or something? Do all the cleaning for a week? No TV for a month? What do you want? I said I was sorry,” Duo replied, frowning even though his tone was that of a sulking child.
“Duo, I think you’re underestimating the severity of this situation…”
“And I think you’re making a big deal out of this,” Duo responded.
“I’m sorry, Duo,” Master growled as he rose to his feet, “but when one of my slaves attempts to run away I do think it’s a big deal!”
It was the first time anyone had said those words out loud since Duo had been found. I had known hearing it put so bluntly would have had some kind of affect on Duo and I expected him to flinch and sit down. I didn’t expect for his mouth to fall open and his eyes to go wide in a mixture of fury and shock.
“You think I tried to run away!” he shouted in a voice too loud to be a question and too shocked to be a statement.
It was Master’s turn to look shocked and confused now. So shocked, in fact, that his usual eloquence failed him and he was only able to utter a startled, “Didn’t you?”
At last the usual Shinigami appeared and Duo rained fire and brimstone upon our heads, spitting acid and glaring daggers all the while.
“You all thought I ran away?” Duo accused, looking both enraged and hurt. I realized, suddenly, that the idea that he hadn’t tried to escape had never crossed my mind. All that time that I had been looking for him, it had been somewhere in the back of my head that I had to keep him from escaping for the sake of Master. That I had to bring back Duo to protect Master, Master’s reputation, and Master’s slaves, even as I worried for Duo’s safety as well. But would I have tried so hard to save Duo if I hadn’t been saving Master as well? After all, I felt that Duo had betrayed me when he ran, but did that add or detract from my resolve to find him? Uncertainty and guilt welled up inside me until I felt physically ill. And Duo’s tirade continued, only adding to my guilt.
“What?” he spat, “The street-rat can’t be trusted outside? The stupid sex-slave must have thought he could run off just as soon as our backs were turned? Ooh, who forgot to tie up Duo? We’d better put him in a gad damned cage or he’ll just run off again! You think I don‘t have any loyalty at all? Or, baring that, any common sense? No, you assholes, I didn‘t run away! I got thrown off my damn horse and almost died!”
“Alright, alright, Duo, that’s enough, calm down,” Master interjected, trying to placate the irate slave.
“It’s not alright!” Duo spat. “It’s not alright that you don’t trust me for even a day, you asshole!”
“Duo, Master’s right,” Quatre defended in a show of unusual boldness. His weekend trip with Master seemed to have added tremendously to his affection for Master. “Why don’t you sit down and have some tea? It might help settle your nerves,” Quatre added, but Duo would not be calmed. Instead, he turned his ire on Quatre.
“Oh! Are you sure you trust me not to gouge your eyes out with the spoon?” Duo hissed. “Can we let me so close to the table, I might break it and beat you to death with the pieces! After all, you all think I’m a wretch anyway! You…!”
At that point, Duo was unable to finish his sentence, as Wufei rose silently and knocked him to the floor.

Wufei 150
Duo was making an ass of himself, I realized suddenly.
In the next moment, Duo was on the ground looking up, holding his cheek in his hand and looking completely bewildered. Meanwhile, my right fist was on my left side, still clenched, and stinging like a bitch. I was upset with myself for this sudden loss of control, but not surprised by my own show of temper. Duo was, after all, being an ass.
Looking down at Duo, who was on his rump, holding his cheek and staring at me with a stunned, hurt expression that told me clearly that he had no idea why I’d struck me. I felt my temper boil again, but managed to restrain myself from physical violence.
“It seems that you believe the efforts of your Master and fellow slaves are less worthy because they were under the impression that you had run away,” I told him coldly, amazed at how level my voice remained. “I feel obligated to inform you of just how wrong you are. Firstly, I must remind you of how likely it was that you would run away. After all, you hate Master Zechs. We are all well aware of that. And wouldn’t it seem suspicious, under the best of circumstances, that you are found missing a mere day after he leaves? Then, even overlooking your intense dislike of your master, can you blame us for suspecting the notorious Shinigami, who has escaped slavery more times than Collar would like to remember, of escaping once again?”
“But maybe you’re right, perhaps we did jump to a conclusion, albeit the most logical one. And yet, regardless of your assumed infraction, what was our response? Heero, immediately, tried to cover for you even though he believed that you had abandoned him. He even managed to convince the rest of us to join him in trying to cover for you by finding you before Master returned. Are these efforts worth your scorn?”
“Then again, we did fail at keeping your transgression from Master, so perhaps it is most noteworthy to look at Master’s actions, once he found that you were missing. Most Masters would merely alert their soldiers of the slave’s absence and give them leave to shoot to kill. And, while I am certain that Zechs informed his guards that you were missing, I am equally certain that no orders to kill or harm were issued. Especially since Zechs immediately set to the task of finding you, putting his own efforts and resources toward finding you. And even when it became clear that you would surely die of exposure instead of making it off the property, at which time all fear of shame from you escape would have been extinguished, Zechs still risked his life to find you. Now, if you still think all of this is worthy of your scorn, stand up. I’ll gladly put you on the floor again, so that you may better contemplate you ungrateful words,” I promised. By this time Duo finally looked adequately ashamed of himself, his shoulders hunched and his eyes trained on the floor.
“Wufei, that’s enough,” Zechs said, tugging me to sit beside him on the small couch. I worried, for a moment, that I might have overstepped my bounds and angered him, but instead I received a quick and almost grateful smile for my efforts. It was only for a moment, but it was enough to tell me that Zechs wasn’t angry, before he turned his attention back to Duo. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’d like to know what you were doing with Bee in the middle of the forest.”
Duo managed to look even more uncomfortable than before, if that’s possible. He wouldn’t look Zechs in the eyes, but neither would he deny the request. Reluctantly, he began talking.
“I guess you probably know by now, but me ’n Heero had a fight while you were away,” he said, then sighed. “I was just so mad. With myself, with Heero, with everything. I just… I needed to get away. I was afraid that I’d say something stupid or do something stupid, so I thought the best way to clear my head would be to take a ride. It never occurred to me that the stupid thing I was trying to avoid doing was the same as riding Bee off in the middle of the night without telling anyone where I was going or when I’d be back. It even started raining, and I still didn’t get the hint. It wasn’t until a bolt of lightening made Bee rear that I realized just how stupid I had been. By the time I hit the ground I had finally realized what a stupid mistake I had made, but by then it was too late. I was unconscious, and damn close to freezing to death.”
“Duo, that is without a doubt the most idiotic thing you’ve done so far,” Zechs told him, a look of exasperation on his face. “First of all, you’re not even experienced to ride after dark even with a chaperone, let alone by yourself. Secondly, you should know better than to ride Bee in the rain, even without the lightening. Do you know how easy it would be for her to slip in the mud and hurt herself or you?” Zechs lectured. “However… I must tell you, taking Bee out was still far less stupid than trying to run away would have been. You will still be punished, have no doubt,” Zechs assured him severely, “but I think it can wait until we’ve all rested a bit more. And so, I’m ordering everyone back to bed.”
“That’s an excellent idea,” I told him, rising and offering him my hand. “You first.”
The surprised and confused look on Zechs’ face was almost comical. I suppose it never struck him that we would assume that his command pertained to himself as well. Perhaps it said something about just how tired he really was, that he couldn’t see just how desperately he needed to sleep. Regardless, I and the others could see that he needed to go back to bed more than anyone else, and we would not rest until he saw it as well.
“Ah… that’s not what I meant. I still need to check in with my guards…”
“You did that this morning.”
“…and the horses need tended to…”
“Trowa did that as soon as he woke up.”
“…and my paperwork is piling up…”
“Enough already. Your papers can wait one day if it means you’ll live to see another. You’re out of excuses,” I told him sternly. It earned me a glare and a huff, but I could tell from his eyes that he was quickly losing ground. “You know none of us will rest well knowing that you’re pushing yourself this hard,’ I told him in a softer tone, and finally saw defeat in his eyes.
“You win, you win,” he said as he held up his hands in a placating manner. “I guess a little more sleep won’t kill me.”
“More like save you,” I said under my breath as I herded Zechs up the stairs. The others followed, quiet and subdued, even Duo. I hoped I hadn’t gone too far with him, but I just hadn’t been able to take his stubbornness any longer. And, as I watched Zechs struggle to hide the soreness in his muscles as he trudged up the stairs, I couldn’t quite regret my harsh words.
Once in the bedroom, Zechs literally fell into bed, facedown with his face buried in a pillow, giving only a grunt of effort and a sigh of satisfaction. I chuckled at him as I passed by, headed instead into the master bathroom. Inside I located a jar of soothing ointment. Now all I had to do was convince my stubborn Master to hold still long enough to let me apply it.
“Wufei? What are you doing in there?” Zechs called, his voice muffled by the pillow.
“What does one usually do in a bathroom?” I teased in response.
“You left the door open, so I knew you weren’t doing that. You’re such a prude about that stuff,” he said chuckling. I snorted. I had never considered myself particularly prudish… merely more refined than others.
“You’re simply a barbarian, that’s all,’ I replied. “Now hold still.”
“Why? What are you…? Ack! Shit, that’s cold! What the hell is that?”
“It’s for your muscles,” I told him patiently. His shirt was bunched around his shoulders and I doubted that I could persuade him to take it off.
“My muscles are fine.”
“You’re so full of shit,” I responded. Zechs grunted in surprise at my crudeness, but actually acquiesced enough to remove his shirt for me.
“Perhaps I am just a bit sore,” he admitted with a smile. “Getting old, maybe,” he joked.
“Oh, I’m sure that’s what it is. Not the marathon riding that you did yesterday or anything, I’m sure it’s your age,” I teased back as I finished his massage. Once I was done, I returned the ointment to the bathroom.
Returning to the bedroom, I hesitated in the doorway to take in the sight before me. Zechs was still on his stomach on the bed, his arms and legs splayed out around him, completely relaxed and unprotected. He had given everything he had last night, poured all that he was into protecting those he cared about. It made something inside me swell with pride, even as staring at his almost nude form caused a swelling of a different kind. It was difficult not to be allured by those planes of golden skin, or the way the muscles in his back ripped and flexed as he breathed. His hair was fanned out over the pillow so that none of his face was visible, moving gently in time with his breathing. He was, to put it plainly, stunningly beautiful, and I decided in an instant that I had to have him once again. I wanted him above me, pouring himself into me.
That decided, I padded softly to the bed and slid in beside him, determined to spring my seduction on him. I had just managed to press myself against and begin kissing his neck when he began to snore. I was so startled that for a full minute I just stared at him.
“Well… damn,” I muttered to myself, knowing that I didn’t have the heart to wake him only to fulfill my carnal pleasures.
I sighed, resigning myself to another night of unfulfilled desires, and contented myself to curl up against Zechs. It wouldn‘t kill me, I reminded myself, life could be far worse than a few weeks of celibacy.
And besides… there was always tomorrow.