How to Handle the Heat

Disclaimer: I don't own FMA. Maybe for X-mas, but as of now, no.


Roy angrily walked down the hallway in one of Central's apartment dorms, carrying his tool box in his right hand. It was hot- too hot for this shit. Weather forecasters stated that all of Amestris would be unusually hot this summer, and boy were they not lying! Heat advisories were set forth throughout Central and many troops were deployed out on rescue missions for the young and elderly.

Roy shifted his tool box as he approached his destination. Major Fawkes, who also happened to be the super of the dorms, was out on one of the rescue and repair missions and unfourtunately, due to learning plumbing trades prior to enlisting in the military, Roy was on the hook to repair anything broken at Central until Fawkes returned. Roy rolled his eyes and prepared himself for the verbal assault sure to be laid into him upon entering the apartment.

”I need you to come down here! I dropped something and I can't find it!!!”

“Sounds more like you need an optometrist than a plumber.”

“DAMMIT WHY CAN'T YOU JUST BE A BENEVOLENT LEADER AND GET YOUR ASS DOWN HERE? I really need you.”



The little bastard was almost begging him on the line when he called, like maybe he really had lost something important. Something other than his mind, definitely to call Roy out in the heat like this. Roy lifted his free hand to knock on the door when the wood suddenly swung open on its own and Ed faced him.

“Where the fuck have you been?!!” Ed's hair was damp and mussed, not slicked back and braided carefully as usual. He was wearing a thin gray shirt with khaki shorts and bare feet. His shirt had light sweat stains under the arms and the whole front of his shirt was wet, but Roy guessed that was more from the broken sink than actual sweat.

Roy frowned and shoved Ed out of the doorway. “You try walking 2 miles in 100 degree weather carrying a 25 pound tool box and tell me how goddamn spry you are.”

Ed smirked as he closed the door. Roy walked through the living room and into the kitchen, briefly stopping to peer into Al's room. “Hey, where is the walking trash can? Doesn't he know how to fix all your whatchamacallits?”

Ed brushed past Roy's bare arm, sending a chill up the older man's spine. “Nah, Winry and Pinako said they needed us to help with chores around their house, but I lied and said I was on an important military mission. He'll be in Risembool for at least 3 more days.” Ed leaned up against the fridge, raising his flesh and metal arms behind his head, making his shirt rise and show off his abs. Roy swallowed and turned away. “Oh, and no...Al doesn't know how to fix all of my whatchamacallits either, smart ass.”

Roy impatiently slapped his hand on the counter. “Are you going to be glib all day with me? Because if so, fix your own damn sink.” He turned to grab the tools and leave when Ed rushed over, grabbing his left hand.

“No, please fix the sink. I..I dropped something important. My mother's earring. I was washing the dishes and when I finished I started to clean the earring. Please get it for me,” Ed whispered, looking ashamed.

Roy glared at him and wrenched his hand free, frowning. “So tell me what happened.”

Ed shrugged and walked back toward the fridge. “I was cleaning my mom's earring to put back in my ear when I hiccupped and dropped the earring. It fell down the drain and I'm not sure of how to get it out.”

Roy looked confused. “You have your ear pierced?” Ed nodded and pulled back the hair on his left side to show the small red hole in his ear cartilage. Roy chuckled. “That is so gay,” he remarked, pretending not to pay attention to Ed's anger.

Ed snickered rudely. “If I were you Mustang, I wouldn't judge on apparel Mr. I-want-women-to-wear-mini-skirts-and-I-wear-wife-beaters-with-gray-cargo-pants-that-are-dirty-because-I-want-to-be-in-the-20-and-not-30-category.”

Roy smirked and decided to take another shot at the boy. “Well Ed, I'm glad you didn't try to get your mom's earring out of the drain. You would have surely fell in and drowned.”

Ed exploded. “SO WHAT THE HELL DOES THAT MEAN? THAT I'M SOME SORT OF TOOTHPICK MIDGET AMEBOA THAT CAN FALL DOWN THE DRAIN IF I GET TOO CLOSE TO THE SINK? I PROBABLY CAN'T TAKE A BATH EITHER BECAUSE I'D GO DOWN THE DRAIN WITH THE WATER, HUH? IS THAT RIGHT?!!”

Roy smiled. “Exactly.”

Ed screamed in anger and frustration and went into his room, slamming the door. Roy waited a few moments by the sink, cleaning under his nails. He so loved to agitate the boy, but still it was too hot for this bullshit. “If you don't come out, I'll turn the faucet on and wash Mommie Dearest's earring down the drain for good.”

Ed opened the door and stuck his head out. “Bullshit.” Roy shrugged and reached for the faucet, causing the boy to screech and run toward him. “No, no no, please fix it. I'm sorry, I'll be quiet.”

Having “won” Roy got down on his knees and opened the bottom cabinets to get to the sink pipes. “Hand me a pot, would you, Fullmetal?” Ed reached down and handed him a pot to catch the ring. Roy swallowed and slightly turned as Ed stood beside him, his well toned leg centimeters from Roy's grasp. Roy carefully unscrewed the pipe and turned it upside down, smiling in triumph when the diamond and sapphire earring fell out.

Roy carefully wiped the water off of the earring with his shirt and wordlessly stood and gently pushed Ed's chin to the right to put the earring in the left hole. Ed blushed slightly at the close contact and smiled at Roy.

“So you aren't useless after all, eh Mustang? Well don't worry, no one will ever hear anything different from me,” Ed said, reaching up to touch the earring. Roy nodded and went to take his leave when Ed stopped him again by a brief touch on the arm.

“Please stay. Have a drink. I do feel bad for calling you all the way over here, the very least I can offer you is a drink, although I'm sure this weather doesn't bother you.” Ed set about getting 2 beers and delivering them to the couch where Roy was now sitting. Ed sat on the table in front of the couch and the two clinked their bottles together before their first drink.

“Why would you say this weather doesn't bother me? My balls are sticking to my leg as sure as yours are,” Roy said, taking another gulp of beer.

Ed shrugged. “Because you are the Flame Alchemist and all fire oriented and shit.”

Roy laughed. “Who am I, Satan?” Ed looked like he was pondering that question and Roy shot him a dirty look. “Besides, just because fire is my strong alchemy point, that doesn't make me immune to it. That would be like me hitting you with that metal pipe I took from the sink and it not hurting you because of you being the Fullmetal Alchemist. Make sense?”

Ed looked sheepishly embarrassed, which was not Roy's point at all. He stared thoughtfully at Ed, who looked perfectly poised on the edge of the table, drinking his beer. His hair glistened in the light, his shirt was drying and it seemed it was form fitting on his chest, lightly outlining his muscles. His flesh leg was perfectly toned and his toenails and fingernails were well manicured, catching Roy's attention. The way Ed looked was starting to affect him, as he kept needing to swallow his saliva back. His staring alerted Ed, who called him on it.

“Roy, am I making you nervous?” Ed crossed his legs and leaned close to Roy, who on impulse leaned away and took a long drink of beer. Ed chuckled and moved to sit on the arm of the couch. “Parched, maybe?”

Blue eyes met playful golden eyes in a flirtatious manner. “Inquisitive is all, Edward. You could have fixed that sink. Why did you bring me here?”

Ed answered by tracing a finger from Roy's shoulder down to his elbow. “I was lonely...bored...and horny.” With that last word, he gave Roy's elbow a sharp poke and slid down on the couch, sitting in Roy's lap.

“I've seen how you look at me. I know you want this.” Ed's face fell when Roy began to laugh. The Flame Alchemist laughed so hard, Ed stood up and had to watch him. Roy actually fell over onto the couch, holding his stomach from the pain of laughing. Ed watched him, humiliated. His plan to seduce Mustang had went horribly awry and all he could do is take the two bottles from the table and walk over to toss them in the trash.

“Who said I was finished with my drink?” Ed turned to yell an obscenity at Roy when soft, hot lips captured his own. Roy had stealthily snuck up behind him when his back was turned. Ed fell into the kiss, turning fully around so that he and Roy faced each other. The kiss was soft and slow but quickly turned harsh and almost violent, both men attacking each other with their lips. Roy shoved Ed against the wall and started to bite and paw at the boy's neck, the heat in the room unbearable.

“I wanted you...I wanted you for so long,” Ed whispered, stabbing his tongue into Roy's mouth after the assault on his neck. Roy pulled away from Ed, panting heavily. Roy stared lustfully into Ed's eyes, which now seemed so wide eyed and innocent. He gently caressed Ed's cheek and gave him a gentle kiss on the forehead. He held Ed at a arms length, searching the boy's face to see if this is what he really wanted. Ed mistook this gesture as rejection. He turned away again, folding his arms.

“Are you happy now, to know how I feel? More ammo for you to hold against me? Is that what this is? Well you can go f-” Ed stopped when he felt Roy wrap his arms around him. Roy started walking backwards, pulling Ed through his apartment. The next thing he knew he was sitting on top of Roy, who was on top of his bed.

“I feel the same way you do, Edward,” Roy whispered, kissing a sensitive spot behind Ed's ear. He unlocked his arms from Ed's chest, only to bring his hands over the boy's lean torso. Ed moaned and bucked against Roy's lap, causing a reaction in the elder alchemist. Roy continued kissing Ed's neck, unfastening the braid and letting the thin blonde hair fall about the boy's shoulders and back.

Ed turned around to face Roy as they began kissing again, this time slow and passionate. Somehow both of their clothes evaporated and Ed was on top of Roy, kissing him and fondling him at the same time. Ed's hands seemed to float down Roy's body and stop at the hardened length, which Ed rubbed on with his flesh hand before moving his lips downward. He opened his mouth and received the shiny throbbing head, which was covered in pre cum. Roy moaned and arched his back, loving being inside the Fullmetal's hot mouth. Ed surprisingly took his time and paid attention to what made Roy groan, massaging the insides of his legs and slowly taking the cock deeper and deeper into his mouth.

Roy was in bliss. The heat from outside was nothing compared to the heat that was being focused on his genitals. The fact that Ed had wanted him and set this whole thing up added to the intense passion. All those cat fights, snippy words, and cut downs were nothing but pent up passion and emotions conflicting. Ed removed his mouth from Roy and straddled the hardened length, using the saliva and precum to move himself down.

Roy squeezed his eyes shut at how tight Ed was, and Ed placed his hands on Roy's chest, scratching into it as the massive length buried itself within him. Roy grabbed his hips and began rocking him back and forth, loving the way his blond hair shook all over his head. Ed leaned down to kiss Roy's mouth, and Roy could taste himself on Ed's lips. He rolled them over so that Ed was on the bottom and began thrusting hard and slow, enjoying the small cries of estacy from Ed as he hit his prostate. He placed both of Ed's legs on his shoulders and thrusted deeper, knowing when he felt the liquid heat on his stomach that his lover came, and moments later sharing in the same experience when he came inside of Ed.

Panting, Roy slid off of Ed, aided by the semen and sweat that was created through their actions. He lay beside Ed, stroking the boy's face and giving him soft, sweet kisses on the lips. Ed smiled at him and played with his raven hair, gently tugging on its strands.

“So what happens now?” Ed asked, reverting back to being an innocent 17 year old.

Roy stood and started to re-dress. “Now I go back to what I was doing before you called.” Ed nodded sadly and looked down. “But tonight Fawkes will be back...and so will I.” Ed raised his head with a smile and reached to hug and kiss Roy. Roy smiled at his new lover and grabbed his tools from the kitchen and left back down the hallway, this time not quite so angry.

>Good night.